Okay, so, I quit my job. I’m moving back in with mom and dad (hey, free food and cable!). I have to raise an insane amount of money so that I can pack all of my necessities into a backpack for a year and live with people I don’t know while leaving behind perfectly good people that I know and love. When I return next November, I will have no money and no job, and will probably be enjoying all the comforts mom and dad’s place has to offer. Again.
So what on earth am I doing here?
Well, simply, here are a few reasons why the World Race seems like the “logical” next step.
Untruth #1: I love asking people for money!
In October 2004, I swore I would never fundraise for anything again. Ever. I’d just raised a sizable sum of money through Team in Training, a nonprofit group that raises money for leukemia and trains everyday people to run marathons and compete in triathlons. While it was one of the greatest experiences of my life (and yes, I polished off 26.2 miles of Irish pavement!), I felt like I had spent my “fundraising card.” Okay, that’s it. I raised some money. It went to a great cause. I’m done!
Untruth #2: I’m a social butterfly.
I said in my bio that “most people think I’m shy and quiet, but it isn’t true.” Well, it’s part true. I love meeting new people! Okay, I like meeting ONE new person. When new people come in the form of crowds, I high-tail it. I like to speak. . . when spoken to.
Untruth #3: A tent is like my second home.
Uh, yeah. I think I’ve spent about . . . 5 nights of my life in a tent. One of my WORST memories was a camping trip. A CHURCH camping trip!! I went into an outfitter store this weekend, walked around, stared at some stuff, tried to blend in between the overpriced ponchos and the Camelbacks and tried not to attract any attention to the fact that I had no idea how to buy camping gear, much less for a year. Yes, AIM has provided me with a packing list, but do you know what kind of selection you have at these places? Yikes. So needless to say, while I love the great outdoors, I generally enjoy Mother Nature in short, non-overnight bursts. Tenting should be a new experience.
* * *
Okay, okay. So there are a couple of reasons that would seem to deter me from this little trip across the globe. But now let me tell you of some other experiences in my life.
Rewind to my middle school years. I can remember sitting in church one Sunday night listening to a presentation about foreign missions. I could not tell you one thing about the presentation or speaker or music that night, but at the end, they had an invitation time for anyone who felt like they were being called to foreign missions. I just knew in my heart that I was one of those people. Although it did not change my life, I will say that it was a life-defining moment. A single hour that I can pinpoint as God planting a seed in my heart. I don’t know if it was the first time I’d ever thought about missions, but it is my earliest memory of knowing it.
All through high school and college, I knew that spending some amount of time oversees was something I wanted to do. As I entered college, I really did not know where my life was going. I started off as a music major, knowing that it probably would not lead me to a career as a full-time musician (I now have different thoughts there. . . ). I felt like I wanted to work in a service field, somewhere that I could make an impact, but I didn’t know how or where. This indecisiveness was a burden for me during my college years, and I continued to question whether or not I was “in the right place” in college at all! I remember seeking the Lord’s guidance, but whether or not I asked Him that exact question, I don’t remember.
Well, a long story made short ends with me deciding to double major in Music and Elementary Education. I enjoyed my education classes, but as senior year, student teaching, and graduation approached, I knew I was going to have some choices to make. For the first time in my life, the path ahead had not been planned out. There was not a very clear next step, and that was scary. Even having chosen the career of an educator, I still felt slightly out of place, wondering if mainstream education was where I belonged.
So I ended up with a great teaching job in a fabulous school. I was set. But I still had this desire in my heart to do something different, especially at this point in my life, and that desire was growing stronger. I’d make up plenty of excuses though.
“I have a steady job in a poor economy. I couldn’t give this up now.”
“What do I have to contribute to a mission team?”
“I have student loans.”
“I don’t want to go ALONE.”
“I would miss my family.”
“I play the harp. I can’t take it with me!!”
“I’m in my mid-twenties. I should be thinking about getting married.”
However, even with the way my life was, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was “in the wrong spot” in a lot of ways. My prayer for about the last year and a half has been, “Here I am, Lord. Send me.” It often continued with something like this:
I’ll do whatever you want me to do,
(as long as it’s not X, Y, or Z),
I’ll go wherever you want me to go
(except here or there),
If I am supposed to stay where I am, I will,
(but really, I’d rather not).
Sound familiar? I truly did want to do what the Lord wanted me to, but I had my own excuses. Nevertheless, there was a desire inside – or a knowledge, perhaps – that wouldn’t let go. I went on a short-term mission trip with my church in the summer of 09 to Canada. It was a wonderful experience and left me more convinced than ever that “something more” was out there for me.
So with the end of my second year approaching, I had really settled on the idea of returning for another school year. I had planned to look for a short-term, summer mission trip. One Saturday afternoon, while putting off schoolwork I’m sure, I began searching for “missions for twentysomethings” and came across the World Race. It did not take me more than an hour of reading stories of real racers on the journey to realize that this was EXACTLY what God had planned for me. I’d never heard of the Race, but it didn’t take me long to understand the passion that these people had for the lost, sick, and hurting people all over the world.
Although I knew immediately that this was something I was going to pursue, I did not submit an application for about another week. I prayed. I weighed my options. I continued reading other racers’ blogs. And through that week, though I thought and prayed, I don’t think I once second-guessed my decision. I felt completely at peace about it. For those of you who know anything about my decision-making capabilities, this is saying a lot. At a point in time when I had basically given up on the idea of following this passion that I believe God gave me at an early age, He answered my prayers that day in May.
Okay, so that was the short version. Really.
Now don’t get me wrong. My mind continues to reel with questions.
“A whole year away? am I crazy!”
“I am NOT a light packer.”
“How on Earth am I going to raise $14,000?”
“Am I going to get a job when I get back?”
“Is it safe?”
There are, however, some basic truths that I know without a doubt and, without a doubt, will provide me strength and courage for the journey.
TRUTH #1: I am a child of God.
“How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” 1 John 3:1
TRUTH #2: He made me the way He did to fulfill His purpose, not mine.
“For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.”
Psalm 139:13, 16
TRUTH #3: He is my Provider and Protector.
“But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. The will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary. they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31
“The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are safe.” Proverbs 18:21
TRUTH #4: I have a task in front of me.
“Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:19
And so I go.
