The application and interview process for the World Race can bring up old demons that you thought you already dealt with but somehow, they tend to creep up in an unexpected way. We all have things from our past that we continue to hold on to – even long after we think we’ve moved on. I’ve done my fair share of sinning but there are definitely a few life experiences that I continue to work through on the road to my redemption.
The World Race has asked me to seek Christian Counseling prior to launch and successfully read “Daring Greatly” by Brene Brown – both which they feel will help me break the chains of guilt & shame and begin walking in the power of freedom. This is no easy feat, but necessary to become the powerhouse God has called me to be on the race and in my everyday life.
Has anyone ever asked you “What are three positive characteristics about yourself?” Can you answer this without a long [awkward] pause? I couldn’t. My Christian Counselor asked me this very question during our last session and I sat there in silence – staring at the ceiling. What am I good at? What would my family and friends say? What is something I admire about myself? I’m driven? I’m punctual? I’m organized? But then it hit me, “These aren’t characteristics – these are qualities!” I couldn’t answer the question and I’m typically never at a lost for words. I asked if I could think about it, so that’s what I’ve done.
As Christians, we must accept the people we are and the things that we’ve done. I accept that I am an imperfect being and that only by the grace of God am forgiven for my past (and future) transgressions [sins] – but that doesn’t mean it’s easy. I am also a person that tends to hold onto things long after the Lord has moved on. Accepting forgiveness is sometimes much harder than asking for or giving it.
The MercyMe album “Welcome to the New” is a very special album to me. I heard it when I was desperately needing Jesus in my life – and is part of the renewal of my faith in the Lord. Every song on that album has spoken to me in different ways and the following song is no different:
“Cause I hear a voice and he calls me redeemed
When others say I’ll never be enough
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world
In the world
In the world
And greater is the One living inside of me
Than he who is living in the world”
I constantly need to remind myself of His greatness: I am forgiven. I am redeemed. I am His.
Funny. Thoughtful. Brave.
No, those aren’t random words – those are my three positive characteristics! After much thought (and a little help from my sister), I have come to the conclusion that I am funny. I am thoughtful. I am brave. I love to make people laugh, I love to do special things for people and I know I am brave – I successfully completed the Disney College Program, I moved to Chicago by myself and I am abandoning my life of comfort to serve people on the other side of the world. Now, what are your three positive characteristics? Think about it!
