Okay so, my last blog was titled “Arise Little Girl” [Part 1]. Part 2 has been circling around in my head, but I’ll not be devoting this entire blog to part 2. But just so you know, my main takeaways from part 2 are: I continued to speak to my human spirit, and tell it to keep playing like a child. One day, the holy spirit put on my heart a picture of ‘little me’ and she pulled out her bin of costumes to play dress up. I used to love to twirl around in my golden Belle dress [Beauty & the Beast anyone?]. Well that same night, 25-year-old me ended up dancing like a fool in front of a room full of 400+ people. We were getting our worship on, but I wanted to get my worship ON. So, it was me and a few crazies up at the front. I’ve danced in worship before, but there was something different about this time. It’s like I was dancing some stuff off of me.. I felt a lot more free. I am loving learning how to speak to my inner spirit and remind her [or it? or him?] to play. I love how the holy spirit is willing to show me a lot more about the ways of the Kingdom through my little girl. I need to be reminded that in the Kingdom, everything is back-to-front and topsy turvy. Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
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On a totally different note, lately life has been a little, oh I don’t know the right word.. spazzy? That’s the way it feels at least. It reminds me of the craziness with all the moving around we did from month to month on the Race. Coming to Gainesville, things haven’t really been what I thought they would be.. mainly because my expectations are getting thrown down again [can we just stop building those up already??] I’m sure that the Lord brought me here, but I haven’t felt a whole lot of His peace lately.
So last weekend I took a trip to the middle-of-basically-nowhere, Kentucky. I stayed with missionary coaches, a couple, who I met at the last World Race training camp. At their encouragement, I chose to get outside of my space and come to an even quieter place than Gainesville [which already has naked land and cattle and stuff] to pray. Really seek the Lord about what He was doing.
And by the end of the weekend, I was confident about what I needed to do.
I’ve been taking a really amazing course on inner healing through a ministry called Elijah House. Been blogging about all this inner healing stuff, and it is what has been on my heart since I came here. It’s because this is what the Lord is doing right now. It’s where my heart is, and I’m realizing, where His heart has been all along.
While we’re at it, life is shaping up to be a series of steps I take that often make no sense to me. They’re just right. You know they’re right when you know the shepherd, and learn to follow his voice. Most of the time I have no clue where I’m going or why. But I’m just learning to go with it. It is the most peace-filled way.. talk about topsy turvy.
With that, I will be stepping back from my time with Adventures In Missions, at least for now. I am planning to remain in Gainesville, focus on inner healing [read the gazillions of books about it that have remained in my trunk, untouched]. Do some shadowing with my Elijah House instructor, and work a part-time job [I’m thinking at a senior living facility in our lovely downtown square:].
Love you all and thank you for coming along with me in these weird-but-awesome steps I’ve been taking! Feel free to reach out to me and ask more about my life anytime.
I will continue to blog too, because.. because.
E
