First of all, let me just apologize for taking a ridiculously long time to blog about Training Camp. It’s something I’ve been meaning to do and thinking about since I got back almost a month ago. I just haven’t really been able to organize my thoughts on it. I wish that I could tell you every story about how God changed my life that week, but it’s just not possible in a few short blog posts. I’m going to try to highlight the main points though, so make sure you stay tuned for my next 2 blog posts as well.
The first thing I want to say goes out to future racers. Don’t read too many Training Camp blogs. I read this bit of advice early on in my blog stalking and I stuck to it. You’ll be amazed at the rumors you hear about what’s going to happen, but I think the best part about it is the not knowing (and this is coming from someone who likes to have a plan for everything). My other bit of advice is to not stress out over it. They’re not going to give you a schedule. You’re never going to know what’s coming next. But that’s the beauty of Training Camp. Embrace it.
Now on to my story.
Training Camp was life changing.
When I got there, I was absolutely overwhelmed. I had met some people at the airport, and I saw some of the people I knew from our gathering in February, but for the most part, I was just overwhelmed. There were so many people, and I was so shy. I recognized almost everyone from Facebook, but I don’t think I went up to anyone to introduce myself. I just just stuck with the people I knew, or I just waited for someone to come to me. Pretty typical.
The next day was, I think, the most challenging for me. I was still meeting people and I was still getting used to the environment and I was just still a little overwhelmed by everything. And to top it all off, it rained. It rained all day. It was miserable. There was one point during the day when we were setting up our tents (in the rain), and I thought I was setting mine up on a spot that was ok, but by the time I had it completely set up, I could see water pooling on my footprint and I realized that what wasn’t a lake before, was quickly turning into one. Thankfully, someone helped me move it, since I already had all of my stuff inside, but it was at that point that I had the thought “I want to go home”.
It was the only time it happened, but I will never forget it.
I didn’t really want to go home. I knew that I was being challenged for a reason, and I ended up opening up to a few girls before our evening talk that night. They prayed with me, they loved me, and that’s when the life changing began.
It was during worship when I started asking God to help me feel His love for me. I knew that He loved me, but I really wanted to feel it.
And boy, did He answer my prayer.
The rest of the week, He did everything He could to show me how much He loved me. I found myself longing to worship because that’s when I felt Him the most, but He mainly used the people around me. And not only did He use them to show me He loved me, but He used them to tell me how beautiful He thought I was.
Beautiful. It’s a word I struggle to describe myself with, but I can’t even count the number of times that people randomly told me I was beautiful, or that I had pretty eyes, or that God thought I was beautiful. There was one time during a worship session that someone came up to me and said that I was shining, and that God wanted her to come tell me how beautiful I was.
Beautiful. Not cute, not pretty, but beautiful. God thinks I’m beautiful, and He loves me.
At the last worship session we had, we were told to walk around and speak love over each other as we felt led. I was kind of at a loss on who to go to, but as I looked around at my squad-mates, the people who had become my family over the last week, every person I made eye contact with had the same look in their eyes. Love. I felt the Love of God more that night than I ever had before or since. I was weeping. I am so loved.
I am loved by my family. I am loved by my friends. I am loved by my squad-mates, and everyone else associated with the World Race. But most of all, I am loved by God. I am loved by a King. I am a King’s daughter, and He thinks I’m beautiful.
And He thinks you’re beautiful too, because He created you. He loves you.
You are so loved!
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