If I have learned anything about community, it's that it can be so bipolar. It can be the best thing for you or the worst thing for you. Honestly, it depends on the day, the minute, the hour. And above all, it just depends on you. What you put in is what you get out.
I started living in community before the World Race. I did it as a training time to get prepared for what I knew I'd be dealing with, but it was never like it is here and now on the World Race.
I lived in a two-bedroom apartment with my best friend back in July of 2011. By December, we decided that having two new roommates move in would be good for us, not just for finances, but for preparation for this crazy journey I am on now. And I thought living four to a two-bedroom apartment was hard sometimes…
Well, shoot. At least I could choose to be alone! All I had to do was go get my happy butt in my car and drive off whenever I had had enough.
In community, you are constantly around people.
Every second of every day.
No breaks except for potty breaks, and sometimes you can't even get by yourself with that.
Whether you are sitting down for dinner or sleeping on a random bunk bed, there is always someone below you, above you, beside you, or near you.
And I won't lie about it, sometimes you just want to SCREAM!
Sometimes you just want to be alone so you go sit on your bed and sleep so you don't have to answer to anyone.
But apart from all the moments where your teammates get on your nerves and apart from the moments from where you have just had enough of people in general, there is such a beautiful thing about it all.
1. I have never had so many people at once pour into me before.
Telling me how beautiful I am to them.
Telling me how much I hear from the Father.
Telling me how I love well.
Telling me how they just enjoy me.
Calling me out and lifting me up in my identity in my Father.
2. I have never been so vulnerable before.
Telling people my mistakes in the past.
Talking about how much I am not that person anymore.
Opening up about every single thing that goes wrong with me.
Receiving so much grace and mercy from them about it all.
3. I have never laughed so much before.
Dude, living in community can be so fun.
People on my squad are funny and make me laugh daily.
There is so much joy that is found in cracking a joke or…watching someone be clumsy.
So although I have my moments where I am surrounded by 35 people and I don't know where to go or what to do because I am just so tired of people, I realize that I don't need to take community for granted. For one, this is how Jesus lived every day. People surrounded him all the time, whether they were his disciples or other people he encountered.
The good thing about it all is that the people I am surrounded with are hoping for the same kind of love, a love that comes from our Father. And that's what unites us and it makes it all okay in the end.
And when I really can't take it anymore, I'll just go sit on my bed, plug my earphones in, and spend some fake time alone. Ha.
Through it all, however, I still choose to accept the daily challenge of community.
It's hard, but it's worth it.
