This is me announcing that I am no longer going on the 2016 October Route 3 World Race trip but that I am still going on the World Race. I’m just going at a different time and on a different route with different people to different places.
For the past few weeks, I have been telling those close to me about how I’m postponing my trip until January. Then tonight I looked up the definition of postpone and I decided that I will not be using that word to describe this new part of my mission journey, because a postponement isn’t an accurate adjective to use for this change in plans. Dictionary.com says that the origin of postponement is Latin. It’s Latin for “laying aside, or putting off.” This word isn’t accurate to describe what’s coming next for my World Race because it implies that this change is a negative thing and that’s absolutely not true. The fact is, I’m not “putting it off”. I’m not “laying it aside”. The World Race isn’t something “to put off, or to lay aside”. If those were my feelings about waiting to leave until later, then I would need to reevaluate going because that would mean I was going for wrong reason. These definitions imply that there is something more important or something better than the World Race that I want to do, or that the World Race is something to dread. I mean think of the things that you put off. You usually put something off because you’re not looking forward to it, you dread it, or it’s something you just don’t want to do, so you wait as long as possible to “get it done”. This isn’t true of my decision to go on the World Race. The Lord has called me to go on the World Race and I am going. He has just decided that waiting until January is going to for my good.
You may be asking why am I waiting to leave and this is my answer: My heart has been burdened about leaving in October and I really have absolutely no idea why. I just know that it’s absolutely been the Lord telling me that October isn’t what He has for me. He has set this route in January aside for me and He has made that abundantly clear for a few weeks. As soon as I made my feelings known to my adviser and told her that I wanted to wait to leave, peace overcame me and a weight was lifted off my shoulders. And while this peace over my decision has been great, it does not mean waiting is going to be easy. Here are some reasons why it’s going to be hard:
First, there is a discouragement that comes from waiting. This is a lie. It’s a dangerous lie that whispers it’s because you’re not good enough. It’s a lie that says oh you’re never going to end up going. It’s a lie that says you could never have made your fundraising deadlines to go in October anyways, so you need this extra time to make it happen. These are lies. The Lord DOES NOT need me to go on the World Race but He has decided to send me. And because of Him, I am worthy. Because of Him, I will go on the World Race. Because of Him, my race will be fully funded at some point in the next year. That is the truth. Mary didn’t feel worthy of carrying Jesus Christ in her womb, and yet the Lord chose her. The Samaritan woman at the well didn’t feel worthy because of her nationality and the Lord spoke to her of living water. He dreamed me up before creation, He knitted me together in my mother’s womb and He loves me.
Secondly, there is an unknown that comes from waiting. I was leaving in October. I had a plan, a decision, a pretty clear path for what’s next for me: The World Race. And while the World Race is definitely still what’s next for me, now there’s this awkward period of time from September to launch in the beginning of January where I have no idea what my life is going to look like. I don’t know where I’m going to live because who let’s someone sign a lease for 3-4 months? I don’t know who I’m going to live with, because who wants to live with someone who’ll be gone soon? I don’t know where I’m going to work because who wants to give a girl a job when she’s leaving for a year? There are so many questions I still have unanswered from this change of routes. But really the Lord has always provided for me, He’s currently providing for me, and He will always provide for me. This is just true of who God is and worrying “does not add one hour to my life”. The bible is full of stories of people who God has provided for. He fed thousands of people multiple times on a few fish and a few loaves of bread. He gave His people food and water when they wandered the desert for forty years. “Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or stow away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?” Matthew 6:26. He’s going to take care of me during the in-between, that is the truth.
Lastly, there are a lot of people who I was leaving with who made the decision a really hard one to make, in a great way. The people who I originally was going with are amazing people. I already know some of them and talk with them often. We’ve named our team, we have dreamed about the places we’re going, we have jokes, and we’ve shared stories already. The lie I’m being told here is that I will now never get to know these people deeply and that I will be missing out on a lot with them and that my “new” route won’t love me the way this one does. The truth is, I already know them and I’m a part of their tribe, their pack, our tribe, our pack, and they already love me really well. No, I won’t get to know a lot of them deeply, I won’t get to experience their trip, or meet the people they meet, or see the things the Lord does on their trip, but I will get to meet them at training camp, I will get to see their stories from home and come alongside others in praying for their journey. Another truth is that I now have another route who I’m going to get to know and love and experience life with for a year and the Lord has a reason for that and the people who I will get to go with are going to be just as amazing and caring and full. And now it’s like I’ve gotten to know TWICE the amount of people who I would have know if I had originally started this journey with January in mind. That just wasn’t the way the Lord chose for getting me on the World Race.
This is what I know for sure. The Lord is good. If He has called me to this mission, He will equip me and provide for me and send me. He loves me and cares for me and has my good in mind. The World Race, yes, is a dream coming true for me, a calling being fulfilled. I just have to wait a little bit longer for it to happen. The bible is full of stories of people who had to wait. Abraham and Sarah waited for a child for a LONG time. Mary and Martha waited for Jesus to heal Lazarus and Lazarus was DEAD when Jesus arrived. Moses waited in the desert for FORTY years and never got to enter into the Promised Land. The whole world waited a few THOUSAND years for their Savior to be born. Waiting is about what God does during that time, not what He is waiting to do. I came across an article in Relevant Magazine that says the truth about waiting much better than I will ever be able to. It’s called 5 Reasons God Makes Us Wait. Here’s the link to that article: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/practical-faith/5-reasons-god-makes-us-wait. The very last sentence of this article says “We may not always understand why we have to wait, but the good news is that God never asks us to wait without Him.”
So I’m waiting, and that’s okay, and I am not alone in my waiting. God is with me. And my hope is that you all choose to pray with me and for me during this time of waiting. Pray for patience from me. Pray against envy and lies and comparison. Pray for this new route to different places. Pray for my fundraising process. Pray for the transition period I’m going to have between training camp and launch. Just please pray, the Lord wants us to ask Him for things and commands us to pray and I’m asking you to join me in that command and to specifically pray for me.
God is so good, y’all and I’m so thankful for this journey.
I will now be leaving in January 2017 on Route 3 which goes to India, Nepal, Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, Greece, Macedonia, Bulgaria, Botswana, Swaziland, and South Africa.
Xo, Emma.
