Following Jesus is hard. The harvest is SO plentiful and there is SO much work to be done that it can seem daunting at times. God has been reminding me that I don’t need to be perfect, I don’t need to be doing everything, and he doesn’t need me to accomplish his will. What I need is to rely on him, put my trust in him, and remain in him. (I have a feeling that no matter how many times I hear this, I will need to relearn it continually).
Lately, I have just been tired. Not physically or mentally, but spiritually. Being obedient has been hard for me, sacrificing finances has been hard for me, sharing the gospel has been hard for me, acting Christ-like has been hard for me. This spiritual exhaustion has been SO GOOD for me because it forces me to give it to God. It reminds me that I am nowhere close to Jesus and it’s a humbling reminder of how much I need him.
The other day, as I was working through my exhaustion in my prayer time, I got the best reminder that I could hear in that moment. It was that one day, we will be in the fullness of God. There will be no tears, no financial burdens, no need to share the gospel, no fatigue, no need for faith, no need for perseverance. What a blessing we have in this lifetime to experience scarcity. There is something special about giving when you have limited resources to give. There is something special about being apart of a redemption story. There is something special about persevering even when you are tired. Living in a world of scarcity requires sacrifice, it requires pain, and it makes the results that much better.
This life is so short, I never want to look back at it one day and wish I did more. I want to persevere through the pain, through the exhaustion, through the scarcity. I want my faith to grow when it shouldn’t, I want to give when it seems like I can’t, I want to share the gospel when it might be embarrassing. I am so happy that I follow a God that doesn’t make it easy, I am so happy that I follow a God who covers the mistakes when I can’t follow through.
