“But I trust in you, O LORD; I say, ‘You are my God.'”
Psalm 31:14
Often, when I’m talking about the World Race and how I will be spending my next year and a half, one of the questions I am asked is simply, “Why?”
And to be completely honest, I’ve done an awful job of answering that question. I have plenty of rational reasons for why I have chosen to be a part of the World Race, and usually, I give one of these.
“I love to see and experience other cultures, and this will enable me to see and serve in 11!”
“I feel called to serve overseas at some point after law school, and this experience lets me see 11 different places I could live. Plus, it gives me the experience of raising money for life abroad for an entire year.”
“This is the perfect time to go. I’ll be done with my undergrad and haven’t committed to a law school.”
“I love adventure and the way I connect with God when I’m outside of my comfort zone.”
All of these are great reasons, but every time I say them, it’s felt like a justification instead of motivation. I feel like I’m defending myself instead of sharing my heart. I think part of that is because I don’t know why.
I have no idea why God had Carly mention the World Race to me in that interview almost a year ago.
I have no idea why the more I looked at the site, the more I felt like this was something I was called to do.
I have no idea why every barrier that was stopping me suddenly disappeared one day.
I have no idea why my heart is so at peace with the decision to go, even though I know it may be the hardest thing I have ever done.
The only answer is that God has called me and asked me to trust.
I pray a lot for God to enable me to trust him with all parts of my life. Last summer, I started to realize that those prayers don’t usually mean magical faith that suddenly allows me to put all my trust in Him. Instead, when I pray for the ability to trust, God gives me circumstances that allow me to trust Him more. It is my responsibility to step into those circumstances with complete trust.
This is one of those circumstances. I have a huge list of ways that God showed me this is where I’m supposed to be, but no earth-shattering reason for why. I have no idea why God is calling me on this adventure. It may be for the reasons I listed above. Or it may simply be to teach me how to trust.
