Just as deadly as a malignant tumor and as crippling as paralysis, this ailment may not take your physical life but will surely invite death to your soul and spirit. This disease, the fear of man, is capable of rendering a Believer inactive. How sad that we are designed to live in freedom, but are held captive by the assumed thoughts of others. Taking ownership of my own struggle, when will I refuse to live a life handicapped by the fear of what those around me may think? The key word in there is MAY. And even if the thoughts of others were ones that viewed me as politically incorrect, hyper-religious, or straight up insane, is what I believe worthy of me shaking off their projected unacceptance?
These past few months on the World Race have been stretching in areas I was not exactly prepared for, but I could not be more thankful for this journey. Wrestling with the troubling thought, "Was that really God or just my own brain?" or "What will they think of me if I'm wrong?!" When praying for young women after an alter call, or in a run-of-the-mill conversation with a friend, I would ask God to speak to them through me, and what seemed like out of nowhere a thought would drop into my head. Instead of giving it to them, I would hoard it in my own head afraid it wasn't really God.
Weary of the mental games and pushed by our leadership, I have resigned from the second-guessing olympics. Surrendering my mouth to Him is a daily process, but to see the encouragement and comfort His words bring people draws my attention towards the Kingdom. As I hear of and experience more of the Kingdom of Heaven, the fear of man that plagued my heart loses its grip.
Experiencing a new found freedom while across the world in Ho Chi Minh City, Vietnam was never something I dreamt about, but the more time I spend with The Lord I realize I get to do and encounter things beyond what I ever thought possible. This lifestyle is not limited to World Racers and has no respect to locations. I dare you to pray a dangerous prayer and see what God speaks to you.
