If
you’ve spent any extensive time with me, you probably know that I am a doer. I
like doing things. I fold paper when groups watch TV. I walk while others sit
to pray. I cross-stitch while others sit to relax. Down time to me still
involves movement. It’s like I constantly have Mexican jumping beans inside of
me…sometimes they jump quickly other times they jump slowly, but they ALWAYS
jump! I like movement. I like doing things. I like getting things done. I like
purpose and obtaining the purpose. And this all involves DOING! Therefore,
being still, being slow, & resting is foreign and unappealing to me. I
really don’t like anything about it because it makes me feel like nothing is
being accomplished….which makes me feel like I am wasting my life and my time.
Being
here in Lutsk, Ukraine for the last few weeks has really brought the “doer�
mentality to the forefront. Our ministry all month long has really challenged
me to rethink ministry & community (previous blogs), but also
effectiveness. I’ve been challenged to see productivity in the midst of S L
O W N E S S.
The
last week and a half, our team has partnered with YWAM-Lutsk, to have a daily
Youth Camp in a neighborhood park. Specifically that meant, we got there an
hour before to pray, did camp for 2 hours, & then spent another hour
praying and planning. During the Youth Camp, I would play soccer with the guys,
while other team members tossed balls, played UNO, and played jump rump with
the girls and younger kids. Sometimes I, too, would play with the younger
ones…because they are just so cute. And I played with the teenage girls,
because I really love that age. Then we’d all sit down together, someone would
share a story or Bible verse & short drama for about 5-10minutes, the kids
would pray, and then we’d play group games like Dodgeball, Tag, & Ninja!
Those are the details.
preparing the balloons…that everyone wanted.
monkey in the middle with “my girls.”
Red Light, Green Light Game
But all that just left me
feeling productive. I felt like I was unable to communicate & speak to them
about Jesus. I questioned it, wondering “How am I impacting their lives if all we do is talk about Jesus
for a few minutes & then play games?� I wasn’t mad or upset or challenging it…just looking for
purpose. And all week long, my teammates would share little tidbits about how
they were sharing love, so it encouraged me enough to just not give up. So I
keep choosing to be in on the ministry.
By
the end of the week, I did have kids running up to hug me. But I was like, “God… I wish I could do
more. I wish I could tell them how wonderful they are & how much You love
them.� I had
all these grand ideas of what I wanted to
do. But then on the last day…still wrestling to find a firm purpose…at the
very last part of camp, I found the
purpose amid the “apparent nothingness.� About 20-30 kids from 7-14
years old all lined up proud and confident that they had learned the bible
verse from the week. (And the got an ice cream cone for such work!!) That was
about 60-70% of the kids that were there. Kids I thought weren’t paying
attention. Kids I thought didn’t care. Kids I thought were only at the camp
because of another kid being there. They knew their verse!
WHY DOES THAT MATTER TO ME?
(I mean wouldn’t I rather
see them get saved and on fire for Jesus?)
But
it hit me. It took me back to the first time I learned a Bible verse, for real.
I was probably 10 or so. I didn’t know much of anything about God. I had been
taught about God at church, but I didn’t remember anything other than He was
real and He wrote the Bible. He didn’t really matter much to me. But then a
girl (from camp) gave me a letter with a single Bible verse & I learned it.
It was only a sentence about how God is our strength, but it really impacted my
life. I repeated the verse when I was scared and when I needed something to run
to because life was hard. I had no “formal� lesson on how to learn scripture,
but I knew. God does things like that…without anyone having to teach you.
So
I’m throwing more of my expectations of how I want to work out the window, so
that God can use me and do His will in the kids’ lives. And we’re praying as a
team that God impacts their lives & that the one Bible Verse really hits
home with them.
Now
going to camp, though it may feel like nothing powerful, is actually a joy. I
know that playing with the girls, throwing balls with the little ones, and
tossing a Frisbee is merely preparing the ground…drawing them in to hear the
Bible verse & the short lesson.
Whenever
you feel like you are doing nothing, because you can’t see any immediate fruit
or because you don’t feel productive…
Ask The Lord what His desire is in the situation.
Ask The Lord what HE wants to accomplish.
And
then give yourself…sow yourself into that…even when you feel like you’re doing
nothing.
Enjoy the slowness.
Enjoy the easy.
Enjoy the rest in the midst
of serving.
Enjoy
that God is moving and will move through you…by you doing the things that are
easy.
Maybe
God’s greatest desire for you today is just to make someone smile…because He
knows they need it. Or maybe His will for you in the moment is to give someone
the extra bit of time to hear them…because He knows they really needed and
wanted someone to listen.
Enjoy the “simple” tasks.
Enjoy the enjoyable tasks.
Serving
Him doesn’t have to be like an Algebra equation. Doing His work doesn’t have to
feel like carrying sandbags up a mountain. It’s okay to feel like you’re doing
nothing as along as you are being faithful to where He called you. He likes you
(and me)…and He really likes us to ENJOY doing His will.
