Here it is, month 10 and I am in Mongolia doing street evangelism. I would have thought that by this far into the race I would be a pro at evangelism. Wrong. Our first day out, I am so nervous. I don’t know how to approach people, or carry on the conversation, or tell people about God and church without being awkward and weird. And not a whole lot of people speak English here and if they do, it is pretty broken English.
So as we are out on the street, I find myself timid and not wanting to approach people for fear of being rejected or looked at as strange, weird, and just a whole awkward conversation. But as we are walking, I pray that God gives me confidence. He reminds me that it isn’t about me. It isn’t about my selfishness of the fear of being rejected. I am here for Him. If He wants me to go and talk to someone, I need to obey. Even if it will be awkward, even if I will be rejected, I need to do it because what God sees and what God does is so much more important than what I am seeing and feeling. It is so much bigger than what I may think or what I think I should be doing. And even if I approach someone and feel like I did nothing or get rejected, or don’t see the harvest of what I did. God still used me. Maybe He used me to plant the seed. God has really helped me grow this month in letting go of my fears and stepping out in faith and trust in Him. I have learned to look, listen, and follow God’s desires over my own.
A lot of the people we met and invited back to the church for game night/English club/open mic night were not Christians and openly said that they will never believe in God. It was heartbreaking and discouraging. I was at a loss of what to do because they were very defiant and very against God. But I was reminded that I can’t change hearts, I can’t force people to believe and trust in God. God has to work in that person’s heart. I am here to listen and obey God. If I listen to what He wants me to do, He will take care of the rest. If bringing people to church, planted the seed that God will continue to water and grow, that is what matters. Although it is hard not to see the harvest, there would never be a harvest without first planting the seed.
