23 plane rides, 11 months, 51 beds later… I'm back in America. I'm home, if you want to call it that. Home is a relative term these days.
I feel like I'm living in a blur. Just a few weeks ago I was living with six others in Cape Town, South Africa of all places in the world, and now, I am home. I'm not living on top of anyone, I've got all the "American" amenities back and it is almost as if nothing happened. As if the last 11 months was a dream.
I sit across from the same people I sat across from a year ago — feeling like no time has passed, but I've all of a sudden got a million and one stories to share, and they've lived a year of life too.
The incredible friends that came to pick me up at the airport in Bozeman!
I've changed. They've changed. And… now what?
Well for starters. I'm pulling a "World Race" move and moving every few days. I've already slept in 5 different locations in America (in the last 10ish days)!
I'm tired and a little overwhelmed at what, I guess we would call "American Culture". Is it culture shock? I'm not sure, I just know that there are a heck of a lot of distractions in America. I've got a million (well, it feels like a million) people to catch up with. Yet, I can't handle too many conversations at a time. I can only talk about the race so much and I've found myself just wanting to move on from this past year. I often want to just be done talking about what happened and move on to what is next.
Yet, God wants me to remember. He wants me to take my eyes off of myself and remember. Remembering that He is good. That He is still God. That He did miracles. And that just as The World Race was His provision, so is the next season of life.
The last night of the race, a squad leader read this scripture :
"The LORD your God who goes before you will Himself fight on your behalf, just as He did for you in Egypt before your eyes, and in the wilderness where you saw how the LORD your God carried you, just as a man carries his son, in all the way which you have walked until you came to this place."
Deuteronomy 1:30,31
The LORD fought on my behalf this past year, just as He had long before the race. I saw down right miracles before the race and during the race that can only be explainable through the hands of Jesus, Himself. He carried me through the wilderness and parted the way through the sea. If you don't believe me, just ask.
As I've returned, satan has overwhelmed me with countless lies. That God isn't going to come through that He is not going to provide. Yet, each day God sustains me. Each day He provides. Even though I cannot see multiple days ahead, I know that God's got me. I know that His promises are sure. And though fear sometimes stifles me, I return to the miracles I've seen this past year. That God provided for every step of the way. That He didn't delay. He always showed up.
I don't want to live in a way that God's miracles are not evident. I don't want to live in a way that demonstrates I'm in control, and not God.
Though this reentry thing is scary and it is water that I've never tread, I know that God is a God who fights on my behalf, just as He did in Central America, Asia and Africa. Reentry is part of The World Race deal, and though I may not like it, it is necessary.
I can either trust God or not. And though my flesh often desires to trust in myself instead of my God — I turn back to Him. Who promises to do exceedingly more than I could ever ask or imagine.
I ask for your prayers in this adjustment to America. Pray for God's provision to come forth. That I would trust that He's got me and that He is who He says that He is. Pray that I would follow Him with obedience whether it makes sense or not.
The World Race is over yet I continue to chase after Jesus with perseverance, knowing this is only the beginning of living for His Kingdom come on this earth.
Final L Squad Picture in Cape Town, South Africa!
