Since I will be leaving in just a few days, I have been going through things at home. I’ve been sorting through old papers, notes, clothes, etc. Its been pretty fun to remember what I’ve done, where I’ve been, and how my life continually changes. I recently came across something written by Henri Nouwen that was given to me by my friend, Carrie, a couple years ago when I was going through a hard time in my spiritual walk. See what you think:
“Dear Lord,
Today I thought of the words of Vincent Van Gogh: ‘It is true there is an ebb and flow, but the sea remains the sea.’ You are the sea. Although I experience many ups and downs in my emotions and often feel great shift in changes in my inner life, you remain the same. Your sameness is not the sameness of a rock, but the sameness of a faithful lover. Out of your love I came to life; by your love I am sustained and to your love I am always called back. There are days of sadness and joy; there are feelings of guilt and feelings of gratitude; there are moments of failure and moments of success; but all of them are embraced by your unfailing love.
My temptation is to doubt your love, to think of myself beyond the reach of your love, to remove myself from the healing radiance of your love. To do these things is to move into darkness of despair.
O Lord, sea of love and goodness, let me not fear too much the storms and winds of my daily life, and let me know that there is an ebb and flow, but that the sea remains the sea.” – Henri Nouwen
Thankfully, I am not in the same spiritual spot when I was given this poem, but I think that it has points that ring true in my life now regarding preparing for the World Race. As I am preparing for this journey, I feel that my emotions are out of whack. I wake up each day wondering how I will feel that day about embarking on this adventure. It goes back and forth between extreme excitement and curiosity to cautiousness and anxiousness. As I experience these emotions it is comforting to know that God is control of my life and He is in control of this trip that I don’t need to “fear too much the storms and winds of daily life…because the sea remains the sea.” I know that there will be times that it will hard times and easy times. I know that there will be times I feel successful and times I feel I failed. I know there will be times where I will miss home and times I won’t. I know there will be times that I feel happy and times when I feel sad. I know that these emotions will come and go throughout the year, but I can be confident that the Lord will remain the same. That is such a comforting thought to me that despite all the change in environment, people, and emotions that God is the same now, tomorrow, and forever and that he is the same God in the US as he is Mexico, South Africa, and China. What an awesome God we serve! I feel so blessed to be continually “embraced by his unfailing love.” Hopefully, this can be an encouragement to you today!
