Before starting the race, I wrote a blog about giving thanks in all things. This month, I have had a couple opportunities to practice it again but one particular afternoon stands out.
After our morning ministry, Ally and I walked back to our house only to discover that the people who had the keys weren’t there. We didn’t know why nor did we have any way to contact them. Neither of us felt like walking 20 minutes back into town either so we just stood outside and waited. It had been raining most of the day so I didn’t want to sit down because the ground was soaked. I was hungry but hadn’t packed anything because I knew I’d get home shortly after one. I was really frustrated and started talking to God about how frustrated I was and how I wished people would just do what they were supposed to do. In the middle of my pity party God asked, “Right now, what do you have to be thankful for?”
It made me pause and think, “what exactly did I have to be thankful for in that moment?” I started praying differently as I thought over the events that had led to this situation in this moment.
Thank You God….for a ride that was ready right when we were leaving the care point, especially since it was raining pretty hard at the time…that we didn’t have to wait 10 or more minutes like usual for a ride…that we didn’t have to walk to the stoplight about a quarter mile away…that the rain kept slowing down and eventually stopped right as we reached the gate…that we had a house to be locked out of…for beds and hot showers…for the protection provided by the gate and walls around the house…for the clouds that remained, preventing us from baking in the sun….
An ant crawled across my arm while another one wandered across my foot. I watched them for a little bit before brushing them off, changing my position, and continuing my prayer.
Thank You God….for the ants that teach us about diligence…for bugs that help with fertilization of the ground…that there aren’t a lot of bugs out…that the ants didn’t bite me…for the grass…for colors…for the mountains…for the much needed rain…for the ability to even be in Swaziland right now…that I used the restroom at the care point instead of waiting until I got to the house…for the kids and teachers at all the care points…for the little bit of water still left in my bottle…for the discipline and correction You give to Your children…that I am loved by You…for the ability and strength to give thanks in all things…
When those with the keys returned, we found out that they had been let out early but then run into the other team doing a prayer walk through the neighborhood surrounding the care point and had joined them not realizing how long they’d be out or how quickly Ally and I would get back. By the time I saw them, God had changed my attitude so that I was excited and encouraged by the unexpected ministry opportunity they had been given even if it was inconvenient for me. I was also thankful for the chance it provided for a much needed reminder on giving thanks in all things, trusting that God is using all things for good.
While in Swaziland, there were 13 of us sharing a house. We split duties for supper and each person was responsible for cleaning up after themselves for breakfast and lunch. Sometimes, however, those dishes didn’t get done, the food wasn’t put away, the counter wasn’t wiped off, the floor wasn’t swept….things didn’t always get cleaned up and it bothered me. A lot. I didn’t realize how much until this month. But each day – usually multiple times a day – I had the choice to extend grace, to give my fellow squadmates the benefit of the doubt. Maybe they had to leave sooner than they thought or couldn’t get to the sink immediately so went to finish something else and then forgot; maybe someone else told them they’d use that food or dish but then changed their mind.
Whatever the reason, it really doesn’t matter. What matters is how I choose to respond. Do I choose to love them well by helping keep the house clean without complaining? Or do I harbor resentment because I’m having to take time out of my day to do something they should have done already? Since it does bother me, am I passive in how I deal with the responsible parties? Do I talk to them directly or do I talk to others and never address the issue with the correct people? (Thank you to those who have pointed out my passive tendencies and called me higher this month.)
I’m still on a journey of becoming more like Christ and there are times when I get it wrong. Recently, I have really seen how living gratitude and grace both for myself and others changes how much I learn from any given situation. The more I practice gratitude and grace, the deeper my trust in God becomes and the more I find that His strength is indeed sufficient in all circumstances.
