I’ve been getting spiritually obese – consuming lots of knowledge and revelation, but not putting it out and sharing much of it.
God recently brought this blog up that I worked so hard on while I was on the Race and for months after I got home. It was great to help process and put words to things God taught me, but this blog was never meant just for me. We are blessed to bless and I’ve withheld these blessings too long and I repent. I’ve withheld them out of fear of people misunderstanding me, fear of people thinking I think I know it all, fear of my vulnerability backfiring, and unbelief in the power of the words God has given me. So I am finally sharing it, and this is going to be the first of many things the Lord has gifted me to share, so you can be looking out for more, and please hold me accountable to continue to put out more as He gives me more. He who is faithful with little will be trusted with much.
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December 2017
I’ve spent the past six months trying to ever so eloquently articulate some massive truths that the Lord has taught me through my experiences this year, truths that I feel responsible to steward well and share with you all. I’ve added, deleted, added, deleted, reworded, and altogether scrapped so much of this blog. It is clear that I am a human unable to perfectly express such truth and that these lessons the Lord has taught me are not just head knowledge that has transformed my mind, but are equally experiences of the heart that have transformed my inner being. I shouldn’t be able to articulate them fully, much less in 1,000 words or less, much less to an audience far removed from the contexts of my experiences.
The Spirit teaches, and I pray that the Spirit opens both your mind and your heart to receive just what you need right now. The Lord will teach you things in His time as you seek Him in faith. Maybe you will learn some things by this blog, but not likely much that will actually stick. To you, these are just crumbs of wisdom from my feasting with God, my seeking of and having experiences with Him. Maybe they will impact you, maybe not. My biggest hope for this blog series is that it inspires you to seek Him yourself and that the life-changing truth, wisdom, and understanding follow in beautiful and incredible ways as they have for me. I want you to know that God has a banquet feast of wisdom, freedom, and greater depths of intimacy with Him waiting for you, and I encourage you to not settle for crumbs when a feast is available to you. The Lord is eagerly waiting, and so is your starving soul.
Lesson 1: Understanding follows obedience.
God has a history of asking his people to do absolutely crazy things.
He asked Abraham to kill his only son whom he waited a quarter of a century for God to give him; He asked Ezekiel to lie on a brick on his left side for 390 days to relay a message to His people whom He already told him wouldn’t even listen to him; He asked Gideon to decrease the size of his army from 32,000 men to 10,000 to 300 in order to defeat the invading Midianite army of about 135,000.
In the gospels, Jesus asks His disciples to pass out five loaves of bread and two fish to a group of 5,000 men and their families, in a story most of you are probably familiar with, the feeding of the 5,000. It is through this particular story that God revealed this Kingdom principle to me: Understanding follows obedience. In this story, Jesus and his disciples are in a desolate place and Jesus has been healing and preaching to multitudes, many of whom are far from their homes. The disciples say to Jesus, “The day is over, and the crowds are hungry. Send them away so they can go and find food for themselves in the villages.” Jesus responds saying, “They don’t need to go away. You feed them.” Jesus tells the people to sit down in groups and he tells the disciples to pass out the measly five loaves and three fish they found from some kid’s lunchbox. The disciples clearly did not have enough even for one family. What Jesus asked his disciples to do didn’t make sense; I would even say it was foolish – giving some people food without giving everyone food. Up until this point in the four gospels, Jesus has healed ailments, preached, and told parables, but not yet had he miraculously multiplied anything; they did not know that was something Jesus could do. Jesus didn’t promise his disciples that when they began passing out the food that it would make it around to everybody. He simply told the people to sit and the disciples to pass out what they had.
It was only then, after they were obedient to his command, that they were able to be the ministers of a miracle unlike any other. It was only then that they understood what God was doing and why Jesus told them to do that. It was only then that they got to experience God as a miraculous provider who provides in abundance for His kids by their own hands.
There are many times in Scripture and in my life where God has asked me to do things that don’t make sense, that I can’t see what good it would do, or that I simply do not want to do or believe could ever be worth doing. This year, He has taught me that I am responsible for my actions, not the results of them, for my obedience and nothing more. He’s got the rest covered. That is the beauty of trusting a God who in all things works to bring far greater good and far more glory than we could ever imagine, much less manufacture ourselves.
I believe that God asks us to do crazy, difficult, or confusing things without full revelation or understanding for three main reasons. One: to test our faith. Two: to build our faith. And three: to allow us to experience more of Him as He reveals Himself.
If you only act upon things that make sense to you, you will miss some of the coolest, Kingdom-bringing experiences God has for you and others. Don’t wait to understand the process or know the outcome before being obedient to the Lord, His commands, and His Word. You’ll live your life forfeiting nearness to God for comfort, and miracles for certainty.
Although God doesn’t need our obedience for His will and Kingdom to come, He lovingly and generously invites us to partake in it. Take that leap of faith. Whatever He is telling you to do, do it. If you’re not sure if it’s him – it is worth the risk! If it’s odd and doesn’t make sense, it is probably Him. Trust Him, and trust that understanding and maybe even a super cool miracle will follow. I’ve seen it time and time again in my life and the lives of others, and every single time it’s been well, well worth it.
