My people-
I lay in my bed about to go to sleep, so exhausted from the emotions and stress I'm currently facing and having no idea how to put my feelings into words.
Here is how to describe it….I'm called to leave my loving family behind. I'm called to leave my students and Young Life kids behind. I'm called to leave my beautiful Lincoln community behind.
It's down to the wire. I'm about to fly solo, Just me and God. Going to be with a group of people I don't know. Living out of 1 backpack I have no idea how to pack. Accepting that my body will most likely fail me multiple times.
At the end of the day I shall believe. Believe that he knows best. Believe he has something "better." Believe living life for others is living life to the full. Why I believe this, I don't know but you see, I've put myself in a position where I have no choice. At this point, telling me not to go would be like telling Beyonce not to sing.
I fight this new path. I become selfish. I think I've done my good deeds. I deserve a break. Why me?
He reminds me. He created me therefore he knows exactly what I need. He died on the cross to forgive my sins therefore he has no intent but to give me freedom and life in what he offers. To choose a different path, would be like settling for a single m& m when someone offers you a sundae. It makes no sense.
Friends, pray for me. Pray for yourself. We have to come to a point where we believe that it's not about us but only him and his love. Until then life is meaningless. My devo stated this
"Every hardship was intentionally orchestrated by Jesus to build your character."
At this point I can't not believe, I'm at the point of no return. At this point all I can say is #YOLO (You Only Live Once). Although we are going to live for an eternity in heaven (PARTY), we are only on this earth once therefore I must allow him to use me every day, every hour, and every minute. If I don't go on this journey, I will regret it and that is a word I freed from my vocabulary the minute I gave my life to Christ. I don't intend on incorporating that back into my vocab anytime soon.
I ask for your support, even if you don't believe in a Jesus. Even if you think what I'm doing is unsafe or stupid. I need your prayer and love and I'm asking for you to stand beside me on this. Your call.
Faithfully yours,
Ellie
Below is a video put together by a world racer near the Dominican Republic. When I watch this, I realize, why would I want to be anywhere else??
