Yes, that’s exactly what was going through my mind on the first and third days here. I was really questioning me being here at Training Camp and going on the WR. I was having feelings of doubt and insecurities that were getting in the way of why God chose to have ME here. Why you ask, because I was so sure in going in the first place. Well let’s start at:
Day 1: My initial reaction on the first worship night…… “These people are crazy! This is too much for me and too many people under one roof”.
I was not raised in a Charismatic church at all. I was raised Catholic so I knew what Catholics did in church and rolling on the floor, dancing around, yelling out, and speaking in tongues was not a norm. Also in my Christian home church, we do have an awesome worship team and we do sing along and raise our hands but no one is doing the worm on the front stage(no offense).
The rest of the days of worship went pretty much the same. Oh and to add didn’t realize that worship was going to last so long. I typically worship 2 songs before service and 2 songs after. It’s what I like and what I’m used to. Didn’t realize I was such a creature of habit and enjoy the routine. The days were also filled with awesome meaty services, which I am so thankful and was in dire need of because my home church has awesome meaty services.
Third or Fourth day: This day was a challenge because the devil was really getting into my head of how weird “these people” are and how I don’t belong and how I shouldn’t be going on the race. I started to believe it.
Then my squad mate who is a prayer warriorJcame and sat with me and really encouraged me to let the devil out and let God in. God only wants the good for me and wouldn’t have put the passion to go on the WR in my heart and wouldn’t have gotten me this far if He didn’t want me going.
Now you ask do I still feel the same about going on the WR and “these crazy people”……..
…..No. I’m still a creature of habit and stick to what I know but I have learned to really enjoy and genuinely appreciate how people worship God. I love that we’re all there for the same reason, the same passion……Jesus. So does it still weird me out all the varieties of how people worship?…..Yes, but I love how we all have one thing in common, the most important thing. Our love for Jesus. So I’m still going on the WR and have an inner peace for where God has me and how he plans on using me, all of us.
