Its kind of extraordinary how different people are from one another. We all have little pieces of our lives that we may be able to compare with another person, but for the most part each one of us is different. We all have our own laugh and different eyes and our own thought processes and different places where we feel most comforted or at rest. That may seem like a very surface level thought, but I think it is really incredible to think about. So with all of that being said you guys are going to learn a lot about me and my weird different life throughout the rest of this blog.
The first thing you should know about me is that I am not a great writer so this might be a little bit all over the place, however the second thing you should know is that even if this is a bit all over the place then I feel like that would represent me pretty well. I could tell you guys things about myself such as how I tend to enjoy artists more obscure songs or how my favorite place on earth is a weird coffee shop that looks more like a house than a coffee shop but that would probably not be very interesting or beneficial for anyone to read. I am currently a freshman in college, this title demands that you be asked what you want to do with your life just about everyday. This infamous question also includes me quickly replying that I’m not sure yet, but that isn’t completely true. I know what I want to do and I actually have for a while, I just was never able to narrow it down to a single title like a nurse or a teacher like most people can. I want to help people. The truth is that I have a lot of dreams, some of them are shy and seemingly impossible (would be quite a leap to post them for everyone to see). Some of my dreams are big, like traveling to every country.. and some of them aren’t so big. Some of my dreams are just really weird, like wanting to go skydiving or giving someone a tattoo or experiencing zero gravity. I want to experience as many things in my life as I can. I know we all have different ideas of what would be a good life, and I agree that there is not one set path people must take to have a good life, it is whatever we want it to be. For some people, me included, the ideal life entails an abundance of experiences rather than possessions. My ideal life looks like traveling to as many places as I can and helping as many people as I can along the way. I want to experience different cultures and people- loving and laughing with each of them. I want to try so many new things, whether its just new food or music or a whole new obstacle in my life (and getting over it). I truly just want to experience my life to the maximum capacity of what is possible for me, growing to be the greatest version of myself that I can be. Nothing sounds more dreamy than a life where you are able to feel truly present and alive in each moment. The bottom line is, things such as clothes and money and other earthly, materialistic things that we so often hold near to our hearts are not as valuable as moments and experiences and emotions and how many people we have been able to touch in our lives.
Something as huge as going on a 9 month missions trip instead of going to school next year is a dream that probably would have used to fall under the “shy and seemingly impossible dreams” category. There is so many things that these 9 months could and I’m sure will entail, and probably (hopefully) a lot that will be a surprise to me later. This season of my life that has lead up to now has been a whirlwind of new emotions and experiences, some great and some not so great. However, I feel there is a lot to be said about things that you learn about life in difficult situations. Two of the most important lessons to me being not to be an “only if” believer, but an “even if” believer and also you cant move away from something without moving toward something else. To me these two things, though they seem very different, both hold a very harsh truth, that is sacrifice. To be an “even if” believer demands that you let go of your expectations. This is important to having a good relationship with God. Being an “only if” believer you are constantly testing God. You look at the cards you are dealt and you give God an ultimatum like “I am only going to believe in you if…” and honestly, God doesn’t work like that. God has a plan for each of us that is far better than any kind of path we could set for ourselves, therefore we should have faith even if things don’t look how we may feel they should at the time. This leads into the second part of this which is that you cant move away from something without moving toward something else. Whatever God took out of your life or whatever you personally are “moving away from” you are headed towards better things. If you are moving away from anger, maybe you are moving towards forgiveness. If you are moving away from sadness, hopefully you end up at joy. I have found a lot of comfort in this season of my life knowing that things I was to leave behind are leading me towards personal growth and now even some of my shy and seemingly impossible dreams.
