
- When telling people in South Africa you are from the United
States, do NOT be surprised if they stop you mid-sentence and say, “OH! You’re
from the USA? Do you know a guy named Tom?” Simply reply with… “Uh, Tom? Yes,
yes I do. And sure, I will most definitely tell Barack you said hello”.
- As a missionary in South Africa travelling the public taxi
system, be prepared for a wide variety of musical tastes…when you hop in your
driver may be pumping anything from disco to rap to old school worship music.
And every taxi will have a huge sticker on their windshield that says something
like ‘Unpredictable’, or ‘Sexylicious’. Hold out for the more responsible
sounding taxis— I prefer the sticker to say something like ‘Sober’.
- As a good missionary in South Africa, you must be ready to do
anything asked of you at a moment’s notice. You may be asked to butter hundreds
of slices of bread or wash hundreds of people’s feet (just don’t get confused
and butter the people’s feet). Be ready to give your testimony on command…break
up a fight…paint someone’s face…even hold a baby or puppy that someone hands
you out of nowhere. (Maybe both!)

- When hosting an abstinence concert don’t be thrown off if the
director posts you in front of the bathroom with the instructions “Make sure
the teenagers don’t have sex in there”. You may find it ironic, but just go
with it.
- If you are riding the Sunday train and a very loud man stands up preaching
fire and brimstone, be sure to join in the fun by belting your rendition of ‘Nothing
But the Blood of Jesus’ at the top of your lungs. You may get some strange
looks, but don’t worry, it will be worth it for the memories.
