I guess that goes without saying. I have heard from many World Race alums that it is very easy to coast through the last quarter of the Race. By the time you reach month eight, you are tired, worn out, and maybe even ready to go home. It's hard to stay focused. It's hard to stay committed to personal growth and encouraging others to grow. I've been praying for the past few weeks and asking God how He wants me to grow and change in the next few months. I had good conversations with other people on my squad. We talked about how my leaving logistics after month three might not have been a choice founded in spiritual growth, but may have been more selfish than anything. I had a realization that they were probably right.
I didn't necessarily come on the Race for spiritual growth. I knew it would be a byproduct of the Race, but I signed up for the Race to serve others. I quickly found out that the Race is not about that. The Race is about spirtual, emotional, and relational growth – all three of which I could definitely use. God knew that. That's why I am here. I fought it for a long time. I wasn't the happiest camper when it came to team time and other times and activities where all that growth is supposed to occur. I'd rather work a 10-hour day at my ministry site.
I knew after those conversations that God was calling me to really press in to those areas of growth. I wrote down some goals in my journal, most of which have to do with me pressing in spiritually and relationally. I think of my friend Matt. He's one of the few people that I've met in my life that actually wants to know how I'm doing when he asks. He's not looking for the typical "I'm fine, thanks!", he wants more. He actually wants to know. I want (and think God is calling me) to learn to love people like that. I want to be invested in people's lives and actually want to hear about what's going on.
Through all of this, I told Erin (one of our squad leaders) that I would be ready and willing to step up in leadership if they had a place that needed to be filled. I left it at that. I trust the process, I trust that she and the rest of the squad leader team would pray in to it and know what was best for me.
Today, Erin told me that if I was willing, they'd like me to step up as a squad leader. The funny thing is that I've specifically said on the Race that I wouldn't want to be a squad leader. I realized something though, I realized that it is an area that has amazing growth potential. Squad leaders are responsible for the spiritual health of the squad, among other things. We are relational. It's scary, but it's awesome at the same time. I have three wonderful team mates, Erin, Travis, and Tess, all of whom will be amazing mentors in the relational and spiritual areas of my life.
I am so excited for the possibilities that lie in front of me, for the growth that all of us will experience over the next three months and for the lives that God will change for the better through this squad.
Please join me in prayer as I step in to this role. Pray that I choose to be "all-in" and really press in to the areas of spiritual. emotional, and relational growth. Pray that God uses me to influence my fellow squad leaders and that I be open to their influence as well.
