School is over for me. It has taken me three years to get an Associate’s degree. Which for the standard, is a year too long, and for a while I have had a hard time with that. All my friends are seniors in college and next year they will be finishing up their schooling and will head onto jobs in vastly different work environments. I know other that have already or just graduated got jobs at hospitals, IBM, magazines, as teachers, and everything in between. I am nowhere near that. I am still living with my parents at home working in food service at 30-50 hours a week. By societies standard I am not doing well, I am behind the eight ball, I could be consider a failure by some because I don’t fit in the normal idea of what a 21 year should be doing.
With all that said I really don’t care that I am behind in what society or even others think for that matter. This isn’t something I have always felt. For a while, up until the past few months, I have always banged my fists at God asking why he wants me to do the things I do. First it was to not join the Armed forces and live a life in Goochland, the place I hated as a kid, instead. Then it was to lead YoungLife and tell high school students about Jesus. Another semi uncomfortable thing but I loved hanging out with people so there was some excitement. At the time I was just starting to figure out a general idea of what my life with Christ looked like. This, going to school and leading YL at the same time, was my first big leap of faith for me. I think YL is an organization I will be in for the rest if my life. Though, to be on Young Life staff you need to have a Bachelor’s degree. Since I skipped my SAT’s…twice, I had to go to community college. It has been hard for me because I didn’t think a higher learning was for me. I was interested in the Navy, or a trade school. Because of my initial lack of interest I failed multiple classes and it put my collegiate career and whole future in the balance. All these things YL, school, fighting with my parents at times, and having to make new friends because I grew away from old ones was hard. It made me freak out and break down every 4 months or so and begin to question everything in life. I didn’t have the answers I didn’t have a plan that was working.
“Jesus answered; I am The Way and The Truth and The Life” (John 14:6). Being in a state of dependence and almost if not total submissiveness was not my plan but Jesus had a plan for that part of my life and as I have seen it come to fruition I don’t doubt the path he paved for me. He didn’t tell me I would fail math twice, fail Spanish, work long hours, struggles with credit card debt, my struggles with past addictions, or any of the struggles I came to. He continually told me like the paralyzed man “pick up your matt and walk” (John 5:8). I am glad that they came and that Jesus has and is chiseling me into being more like him despite my iniquities and short comings.
This is what this trip is for it’s a step in faith. They have all been hard and scary. I don’t know how the money will come for this trip. I don’t how I will get the gear, the vaccinations, the physical aspect, or how I will be able to from relationship with people from other countries. I just have to remember Jesus saying “Come, follow me,” Jesus said, “and I will send you out to fish for people” (Matthew 4:19).
I am at $5,500 currently. I have another $500 pledged by the time of my next deadline of August 15th. Anything helps $10 or $20 a month would mean a lot. Maybe you have more or can’t give monthly and $50, $100, or $200 is more feasible. This or any prayer will prove to believers and non-believers alike that Jesus is someone to talk about at great length. I keep true to his promises and depend on him who changed my life.
