Recently I have been attending a new church that has been amazing! The church I was previously attending is great and was a big part of my life for the past 4 years, but I really have felt God calling me to look somewhere else. Luckily I have an amazing friend who was also in the same situation and had attended this church a few times, and invited me. I instantly fell in love. I fell in love with the people, the music, the pastor, the location (which is in the basement of one of Indy’s concert venues-how freaking cool?!), and most importantly the presence of God that I felt in each conversation, each song, and the message.
While going to this new church and starting my new year I was on such a high with God. I was spending so much extra time with him and truly seeking out his face. But sadly with every hill there is a ditch. I was on the top of this hill and kinda hitting a milestone in God and I’s relationship, but I let the devil get to me. He kept telling me lies about myself and my worth, and the worst part- I bought into it. I started looking at my body and health and began getting into the mindset of “not good enough.” I looked at the amount of money I have raised compared to fellow racers, and heard “not good enough.” I looked at my communication with God and heard “not gonna last and certainly not good enough.” I listened to these terrible lies and began to feel myself slide down this hill right into the ditch I had so badly wanted to avoid.
But tonight God truly did some work in my heart.
I went to an Encounter (Worship) Night my church was holding. I went in with the idea that we are going to sing some songs and we’ll all be on our way. Wrong. God had been planning this night for me, and many others, for weeks. He knew it would fall right in a time that I truly needed the most. I needed to feel the Holy Spirit and feel connected to Him, and that is exactly what happened. At first we started with some communion and prayer, then got into some songs. About halfway through the night friend of mine came up and asked if she could pray with me. At this point I have been generic christian ‘worshipping’- sang the words and clapped every now and then.
We all know what I’m talking about, and we have all been there.
But she asks to pray for me, so of course I agree.
She starts praying about my identity in Christ and my worth and how I’m beautiful and loved. I have been to women’s conferences so I have heard these things said many times, but it really hit deep this time. I am loved. I am worthy of God. I am worthy of the one who made the freaking galaxy. He loves me, and He loves you. He thinks I’m beautiful and precious. And most importantly He wants a relationship with me, and He personally chose me.
W O W.
I needed those words prayed over me in that moment-good lookin’ out God!
But this whole night gets better. After praying with this sweet friend of mine, I truly start worshipping. Like Holy Spirit tears flowing worshipping.
We have all been here too!
And this older woman comes up to me. Never met her, honestly I had never even seen her before. And she asks to talk to me..
Of course I was thrown off, but it’s not like I was going to turn away this elderly woman.
She starts to say, “God wanted me to tell you, that you will do great things. He will use you in so many ways you are going to touch so many people’s lives and you will tell so many about God. You will encounter God in such new and deep ways- your relationship will go to a level you have never experienced before. You will find your true identity in Christ. He is preparing something Huge for you. He is working on your future right now. It will be so big and you will do so much for Him. You will do things others have never done in your career and it will be unique and special to you-like you. So many people will be touched by what you do.”
At this point I am bawling and thanking this woman as everyone continues to worship. I have never had a conversation with her and she didn’t know my situation or my struggles. But God did and he used her to talk to me directly, and honestly- COOLEST MOMENT EVER!
I just wanted to share this amazing God moment with all the people I love and care about. You are all supporting me so much, and I want to thank you all. I was tricked by the devil into thinking I couldn’t do this, but once again God has shown me- He’s got my back.
Thank you all!
Blessings. x
