Time flies much too fast these days.
And these have been some of the very best days.
People warned me at training and launch that this would be much harder than I expected, but of course I didn’t fully grasp just how hard at that moment. I never could have truly prepared myself for the ways I was challenged and broken. I couldn’t have expected the trials or the immense blessings that have come out of these past eleven months. But will I miss the Race? No. I don’t mean that I won’t miss the people, the challenges, and the constant changes. But I won’t miss “the Race”. Because I haven’t missed it. I haven’t missed the point. As sad as I am to watch this season end and know that I will no longer be living and breathing with these amazing people that just eleven months ago were complete strangers, I can’t help but get excited for the more that the Lord wants to do.
Sure, I’m not at all ready for everyone in my life to ask the dreaded, darned question: “How was your trip?” (If you’re reading this, please make a mental note not to ask that). I’m not ready for people to expect me to go back to “normal”. But I am ready to start this next part of the race. I am ready to keep running and see just how much endurance and determination I have gained.
So here’s the basic answer to the looming question, “What next?”
School: Leaving for this journey, I was on deferment from California Baptist University and honestly hoped that God would call me into fulltime overseas missions. However, month 1, God confirmed the need to finish school as well as changing my coarse completely as he developed my love for teaching. I mean, I had first and fourth graders. There was no way my heart was making it out alive. Since then, I have taught in multiple countries and my love for it has grown. So school is a process in the making… as is teaching abroad in those countries that don’t allow “missionaries”. Not only have I found that I love teaching, but I would be able to get to know families and people on a more intimate level and meet whatever needs the Lord throws my way (without support raising, thank goodness) in whatever way I can.
Work: I was offered a job I would have loved to take with an organization I work with at home. However, with the financial situation still up in the air and paying for school and needing to find a car, work is a little up in the air so far. No matter what I will definitely be involved in this ministry whether that’s on staff or as a volunteer. And there’s always barista-ing to fall back on.
Writing: Here’s the really fun part! While in South Africa, I was introduced to a man with a story. A story that needs to be told and a situation that requires justice. I am so so thankful that he is entrusting me to try to tell his story. Upon returning home, going to school, and working, I will begin the process of countless interviews and writing the story not only of this man, but of a township, and an entire people in South Africa in a war that’s not quite over. I will be saving up to go back for a short term trip. Through this whole process I could use all the prayer I can get. I believe writing—particularly writing to bring about truth, justice, and shed light on silenced stories, is something that the Lord is bringing me into and it excites and sparks my soul!
My life:
All of these things paint a pretty picture. But it’s open to interpretation. It’s open to mishaps and changes at any moment, as any plans are. But the foundation will be unchanging. I want to be a person of passion. An unrelenting warrior for justice, completely fixated on freedom.
Preparing to come home, I’ve read through Daniel a couple of times. The biggest thing that has hit me is the example of zero pluralism. How the men whose stories are told lived in, loved, and were a valuable part of a culture they couldn’t completely agree with. And yet they took joy in it, they were a part of it, they were even in leadership. Yet, their focus remained the same. Their purpose was unwavering, and their convictions remained the same. You can look for a blog starting up pretty soon after I get home based off of these themes and keep ya’ll updated through the journey.
