No. What does this word mean? The textbook definition says that as a noun it means, “not at all; a negative answer or decision.” Today, however, I found out that this word means a lot more to me.
You would think that coming out of a sales background, and not just that but a door-to-door sales background, I would have already fought and won my battle with the word no, but alas, this is not the case. After five years of hearing the word no more times than I can count I still have issues hearing and interpreting the word no.
So then what happened today as I was trying desperately to get someone to walk to the internet with me and kept getting no, no, and no from my team and squad mates? Well first of all lets just say that I was not having it, and second of all some feelings re-surfaced that were pretty intense.
Feelings of rejection, failure, anger, and fear were of a few I experienced. They were followed by thoughts about what I could have done differently in the situation or how I could “pitch” the next person better in order to get the answer I wanted. In those moments there were quite a few lies running through my mind about how I felt about my team-mates and how they feel about me. In that moment I felt they were the enemy. They all hated me, and I hated them for hating me.
In my sales career, I remember several times being so overcome with feelings of failure and rejection that I would sit on the sidewalk and cry. Having heard the word “no “so many times in a day I could no longer emotionally separate the word from my self-worth. On a bad day, I would call my mom and tell her about how awful I was feeling and something miraculous would happen every time. I would sell the next door. She would say verbatim on the phone, “I know honey it’s rough. But pick yourself back up. I know you are gonna sell the next one!” I choose to believe this was God spurring me on because seriously that is how it would happen.
Alas, as I prayed about why I was feeling this way, I realized that for me, the word no tells me a lot more than, “I would rather not.” This particular word and my fear of it carries quite a bit of weight in my heart and life. Though I have not knocked a door in over a year hearing this word still tells me that I am a failure, that I am being rejected, and that I am not good enough. It leaves me desperate and emotionally vulnerable, feeling bad about myself and convinced that I am worthless.
Is this what God says about me? I think not.
Something else that God has really laid on my heart this year, and something else I learned in my sales career, is the concept of daily affirmations and standing firm in the truth; the truth of who you are and how God sees you. On a three day fast in Nepal God put it on my heart to do Daily Affirmations for myself about who I am as a daughter. It is something that I am not perfect at and I have to keep reminding myself to do, but when I do them it really blesses me.
Daily affirmations are things that you say to yourself and over yourself to encourage, empower, and change thoughts and feelings that you may have about situations, people, or yourself. The spiritual, mental, and emotional weight they carry is immense so you need to be careful what you say and speak over yourself and the people around you. If you let God lead you in your Daily Affirmations you will find the right ones that will bless you and not be manipulative over situations or people or your own mind or feelings.
The power affirmations have in our lives is biblical. As I did research today for a lesson I was teaching I referenced the power of the tongue in the Bible and found 75 scripture references that have to do with the power of our words! And isn’t it true that the first thing the Bible says is that God “SPOKE” the world into existence? Crazy! And isn’t it also true that the manipulative words of the serpent were the ones that twisted the truth, made Adam and Eve doubt and rebel against God, and doomed humanity to the world we live in today? Well if you believe in the God of the Bible then YES!
Our words carry weight!
Proverbs 18:21 “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat it’s fruit”
James 3:4-5 “Or take ships as an example. Although they are large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts.
Genesis 1:3: “And God said, ‘Let there be light,’ and there was light.
Psalms 19:14 “May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight O Lord, my Rock, my Redeemer."
Imagine a world where people only spoke the truth in love only! Can you imagine how it would change?
So here is your challenge. Pray about the things you need to speak some loving truth over in your heart and life. Pray and ask God to give you the words and the truths to say. Then say them, everyday, for a week. For an extra challenge look yourself in the mirror when you say them. Here are a few of mine from Nepal to help you get started.
- I am worthy of love.
- People like me.
- I am forgiven.
- I am a new creation.
- God has awesome plans for my life.
- I am beautiful.
May God bless you all and reveal himself to you daily! Love you!
