I am officially one month away from training camp, and about 3 months (82 days) away from going out into the field! These dates are quickly approaching and as I continue to talk with friends, family, co-workers, strangers, etc. about what I will be doing the number one question asked is, “are you excited?” My response normally goes a little something like “Yes! I am super excited!” Of course I’m excited, what’s not to be excited about? I’m preparing to surrender my comfort, my everything (more than I already have) to go in obedience to what the Lord has called me. I am going to grow in so many ways in my relationship with the Lord. I will have the opportunity to know what it means to fully trust that the Lord will provide and protect. I am ecstatic to witness miracles and revival, my heart longs to see people come to know our Saviour. I’m excited to work with the Red Light District in Thailand, to reach out to those children and women, showing them they don’t need to be afraid and they are loved by us and their heavenly father. I’m thrilled to play with the children on the dirt roads of Malawi, and go door to door praying for families in Guatemala. This is a life changing experience that will be one of the best years of my life!
But what I don’t normally open up about are all my other emotions building up inside of me. The emotions that sometimes seem to swallow the feeling of excitement. I’m scared, scared to live outside of my comfort zone for 9 months. To waking up with a snake in my sleeping bag, or a tarantula on my face (yes this really happens!). I’m terrified of how the Lord will break me out on the missions field, continuing to give me His heart for people. I’m scared that something very treacherous will happen. What can I take away from this fear? Fear does not come from the Lord, fear comes from the things of the world and the enemy. This is teaching me to let my guard down and continually pray, knowing and believing everything will be okay, because this is God’s will and He is an almighty protector with our best interest in mind. And He sure as heck knows I NEVER want to wake up next to a snake!
Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV
Sometimes I get sad thinking about leaving for that long of a duration. It’s sad to think about leaving my family and everyone I care about for 9 months, not knowing how good of wifi I will have to write an email, or how long I will have to facetime back home. I won’t be there to celebrate holidays with the family and participate in our crazy Black Friday shenanigans! But hey, I’ll be there the following year with lots of crazy, awesome, insane, and unbelievable stories! It helps a lot that I have an extremely supportive family that is showing me nothing but love.
Nervous? Yes. I get a little nervous at times…I am about to spend 9 months with 55 girls who I don’t know at all. I can already tell they are amazing girls with hearts seeking the Lord, but it’s still nerve racking. What makes the nerves shoot through the roof is the horror stories you hear from previous racers. Cockroaches in your packs, nothing to eat but pig organs, being chased by monkeys…okay maybe not that crazy, but you get what I mean! Yes, the previous racers like to amp up the stories and over exaggerated some, but those stories stick to the back of your brain!
Lately I’ve been feeling really curious about what to expect. I’ll think up scenarios in my head about how different situations and outreaches will go. I’m curious to see the relationships I build with not only my team, but the people we come in contact with. To see how each country does things differently. Curious to see what exactly our outreaches will be, and how they will go. Overall, I really am beyond excited. My response to everyone saying “Yes! I am super excited!” is nothing but true!! This is a life changing opportunity and I am beyond blessed to be able to go. I am 100% certain this is the next step God is calling me to and it’s going to be amazing to experience, and learn why exactly He has called me to the World Race. Maybe it will lead me to my later steps in life.
