When I wrote my three-part blog in Malawi, I was sure God was done healing and redeeming me in the area of teaching. I am a highly-qualified teacher. The Lord has and will use my gifts and passions for His Kingdom. I can move forward and look for what is next. Case-closed. Time to happily and wholly move on.
But Got had a surprise in store for me, which means a surprise part 4 for you! And because it is so extra-special, it is unfortunately extra-long. It also has no pictures because I haven’t taken any yet. Basically, it breaks every blogging rule. But please, please, please… Hang on. I hope you will find it worth your time.
Ready to put teaching in its happy “In the Past and moving forward box”, I left Nkhata Bay, Malawi.
Three months later, God brought me to Siem Reap Ministries in Cambodia. And you know what I get to do here?
I get to teach kindergarten. I get to teach Kindergarten!
I also get to teach English to ages ranging from 7-15. I get to teach Bible. I get to tutor. I get to hang out with three awesome little boys (oh, how I miss nannying my kids in Florida). In addition to all this, I get to teach another group – a group I did not expect to teach (more on this when we come full-circle).
Let’s rewind a bit.
Leaving Thailand, I was discouraged. Though I loved it, I was listless. In a place of such brokenness, I felt nothing. My passions were not stirred. I felt distant from God and people. I was ready to throw on a pair of skates and coast through the rest of the Race. During our mini-debrief, I wasn’t at all myself (sorry, C-Squad, for the sassy, grumpy, and awkward). I confided in a former teammate that I felt like I was shrinking back into my pre-Race self. I never want to see her again, and I was quickly becoming her: self-conscious, anxious, worried, passionless, and questioning her place in the mix of things. God blessed me with the ability to see I wasn’t myself and friends who recognized the change, as well. Because of these two things, I came to Cambodia determined to shove the lies of my old self right where they belonged…straight back to Hell.
The instant we pulled into the drive of the church compound where we live and work, I knew this month was going to be special. A fire has reignited in my heart and I never want it to go out. Helping teachers, educating children, building relationships through love and learning – I want to see these things transition into whatever my life looks like in a few months or a few years or a few decades.
You see, I have this secret dream. Not many people know this, so I am trusting you with this desire. Because I am trusting you, it means I need you to pray for it. Will you do that?
Okay, here it goes:
I want to help coach teachers all-over the world, traveling to partner schools in third-world and developing countries for a few weeks at a time and help show the teachers how to implement best practice teaching strategies. Through multiple visits and trainings a year, I want to encourage local teachers to better their community and build relationships that will benefit children and grow the kingdom of God. I want to develop an international Sunday school curriculum and program that disciples children in foundational concepts of following Christ, but also helps supplement their education. I want to see the upcoming generation treated as they should be – as the next group of Christ-followers to lead people to the kingdom, as beautiful children of God, as more than “just kids.”
This dream is relatively new, but I had already almost given it up as a possibility. I am not qualified enough. I don’t have enough experience. Does this kind of program even exist or will I have to develop it from the ground up? Would anyone want it? Would it even do any good? Until this month, I put this dream on the “never-to-be-realized” shelf. However, God is using this month to whisper confidence and confirmation into it, and I may soon be taking it back down to find a new home. Because (full-circle), this month I am teaching a new group. I am teaching my team.
God is teaching me how to teach people how to teach.
Follow that?
God is giving me the beautiful opportunity to develop a skill specifically-tailored for my secret dream with a group of forgiving, supportive, loving, and eager-to-learn women.
I am so phenomenally blessed.
I am teaching kindergarten.
I am teaching teachers.
I am passionate.
I am dreaming.
I am vibrant.
I am alive.
And God is not an Indian-Giver.
