Jesus Feeding the Five Thousand – if you grew up in church, you grew up knowing this story. If you did not – check it out. Look at the account in Matthew 14. For time’s sake, I won’t recount the tale here. However, I do want to highlight something that only just began to stand out to me. The disciples look at the immense crowd, see the 5 loaves and 2 fish God provided, and scoff. “This will never be enough,” they must have thought. “Send the people away.” Jesus, though, looked at what God provided, gave thanks for it, and used it faithfully. This week, during hut-to-hut evangelism in Livingstone, one woman taught me this lesson in a way that 24 years of studying this story never could.
Eunice is a 52-year-old Zambian woman with a beautiful soul and a fiery passion for the Lord. She is a mother of five, grandmother to two, and a support to all in her community. I could use many other words to describe Eunice, as well – widow, evangelizer, HIV+, joyful, destitute, strong, singer … but one word stands out above all others.
Faithful. Eunice is faithful.
You see, Eunice has a dream and a passion. She began telling me about it almost immediately when we met on Tuesday.
“You see all these children?” she asked.
“Yes,” I replied.
“They should be in school. But many of their parents cannot afford it. The rest of them do not have parents.”
My heart shattered. I could easily count 20 children running, waving excitedly, towards us. There are at least a hundred more to come throughout the day.
“Someone needs to teach them – to give them a chance. I am not a teacher by profession, but God has given me the gift to teach and a vision. I am going to open a school for them.”
“I am a teacher,” I tell her. “And hearing this breaks my heart. I know the burden you feel.”
She launches into her story – how her own daughters have turned to drinking because they have no education. How she fears they, like many of the girls, will turn to prostitution. How she lost her husband to HIV and has been living with the disease since 1994. How the school was supposed to open several times, the latest attempt in May, but each time she ran into complications. She had so many stories of almost success with her dream, but each ended in complications.
“Complications,” she kept calling them. I knew what she meant – “Money.”
“Money, money, money,” she finally admitted. “There is never enough money.”
And then I was not only heartbroken; I was angry. Money. It is just MONEY. And 300 kwacha (about $50) is all that stands between her and the straw mats she needs to open her school in September. I wanted to give her all the cash in my bag.
“No,” God said.
Why not, God? Why can I not use what you have given me to bless this woman?
Through Eunice, God answers.
“God is good,” she proclaims. She begins to recount the ways God HAS provided. He gave her an abandoned house. Instead of saying, “This home is not good enough to be a school,” she faithfully prepares the building to hold children. She has lived with and lost her husband to HIV, and instead of blaming God and saying, “This life is not enough,” she uses her story to minister to and teach HIV+ mothers and care for HIV orphans. When she cannot open her school, she does not sit around waiting – she ministers with her feet and her words. Instead of looking at the measly amounts of money she pulls in at her market stand and saying, “God this is not enough,” she faithfully invests it into her family and her school, waiting for Him to provide what is next.
Eunice has not looked at her “complications” and said, “This is not enough – send the children away.” She gives thanks to the Lord, joyfully works with what He gives her daily, and faithfully waits for the provision she knows is to come.
Yes, it is just money to some of us. But to Eunice, it is a testament to the Lord’s promises and faithfulness. I told Eunice how much her vision and story encouraged me and to keep faithfully pursuing it, because I know the Lord will provide. I am confident that she will see the goodness of the Lord as she continues to walk in faith. We shouldn’t worry about money…because it is just money. Our God is SO MUCH BIGGER THAN MONEY. Our God is a father who sees our dreams and provides. He will provide for me. He is providing for you. He will provide for Eunice, and she will have a school.
Through Eunice’s story, God put a challenge on my heart that I want to share with you. I have several brothers and sisters on C-Squad that are also walking in the same faith as Eunice. Listed below are the blogs of just a few. They are not fully-funded, and our final deadline is July 1. They are learning to walk daily in the waiting, not know from where the funding will come. But they have faith that it will.
kelseykraus.theworldrace.org
caitclausing.theworldrace.org
laceyjaeger.theworldrace.org
ardendecuir.theworldrace.org
christinacates.theworldrace.org
anthonyguidotti.theworldrace.org
jasonclark.theworldrace.org
I ask that you please consider supporting one of more of them. Read their blogs; take their stories to heart. Maybe you need to tell yourself it is just money, and just as God is using you to support them, He will provide for you. To some, it is just money, but to my family here it is the faithfulness of the Lord and His promises.
As I look at my ever-decreasing bank account, I think “Nothing I give will be enough. Why bother?” Then I remember Eunice, and I know that God wants me to faithfully use my fish and loaves. So instead, I thank God for giving me the means to give something, and I faithfully click “Submit,” knowing He will use it for good. I don’t tell you this to glorify myself in anyway, but to bring glory to God and the lesson He is teaching me.
No amount of money you give is “not enough.” It will all be used faithfully. It will all be used to glorify God and spread His kingdom as we continue to meet and minister to beautiful people like Eunice.
