As an artist, it is very hard to commit and do what you love to do. Hard because it’s something that most think is not a real job and because it’s a scary thing to commit to and hopefully find a job in the years to come. Ever since I have been in high school and into college that exact same feeling is something I struggled with! Not knowing if my parents were going to support me on going to art school and if it would be worth it, was something that constantly killed me.
I originally was going to attend Savannah College of Art and Design (SCAD) right after high school but because of it being super expensive I decided to head over to Georgia State. I started of as an art major but soon fell into my own thoughts and changed it over to Exercise Science ( I do NOT know what I was thinking haha). I stuck with this for a whole semester only to realize that I hated it. Once again I switched it over to art but still was not sure of what I wanted to focus on. As the years went by my desire to do art diminished and my love for Georgia State disappeared. Soon after I again applied to SCAD and got in with an Academic Honors Scholarship plus a $7000 scholarship!!! Praise JESUS!!!!!
Although I got in, I financially once again could not attend so I had to come back home to live with my parents in Dalton, GA. (yes the carpet capital of the world) As by the nickname you can only imagine how boring and non-artistic it seemingly is. Yea it sucks but I knew that the Lord had brought me back for a specific reason. I soon started praying that God would lead me to a group of guys to have bible study with and for Him to lead me to why He had brought me back to my hometown. He answered my prayers and led me to have bible study with Frankie and his Dad as well as with a group that we call Grass Roots. Week by week we grow as brothers and sisters through Christ.
Through all of this I still felt like coming back home was pointless and at this point it was getting to me. I started to terribly miss all my friends! Being able to go hang out with my people and most importantly missing out on going to church events was a huge bummer. On top of that I missed being at The Real Movement. This organization is one that I take to heart because of the people there and the environment that God surrounds us with. Its an organization that was solely made to build real relationships and community for college aged students based on secure vulnerability. Not being able to go back to the Blue House truly started getting to me to the point where I would cry randomly throughout the day. I started to feel alone, forgotten and unworthy!
Although this was all going on, God was not giving up on what He was working within me. My Grass Roots group is fairly new but is one I cherish and one where my heart is at the moment. I love being able to go into a house that is full of strangers to then being able to call them brothers and sisters. I have learned through them and through God that I am worthy to go out and make disciples of every nation.
“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
Before you were born I set you apart;
I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.
“Alas, Sovereign Lord,” I said, ” I do not know how to speak; I am too young.
But the Lord said to me, ” Do not say, ‘I am too young.’ You must go to everyone
I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them for I am
with you and will rescue you,” declares the Lord.”
-Jeremiah 1:5-8
He is currently about to send me off to Los Alcarizzos, Dominican Republic and I thought I was not worthy of any of this. I was so terrified of having to come up with $1350 to be able to go. I had up until March to gather together $600, which at the time we were told I was absolutely stuck with how I was going to come up with that amount. Amazingly God showed up through friends, family and even strangers! Within a month God provided the full amount!!! I doubted so much and although I did struggle at first with coming up with ideas I had to trust Him and cling onto Him! He sometimes allows us to go through dry seasons so that our faith may grow and so that at the end we may cherish Him!
My dry season is over in this time of life and I give thanks to my Lord. He allowed me to go through a season of self-doubt, confusion, and darkness so that today I could allow Him to work fully in my heart. By far though this does not mean I am holy and I don’t go through tribulations. On the contrary, we as Christians know that as our mission and what we are entrusted with grows so our tribulations and judgment of people towards us grows. I for myself stand in the persecution of everything because the glory that comes after it is well worth it! Through all of this we hold onto to our anchor and to our everlasting fountain of water! For one I am struggling with pornography at the moment but with the help of my friend Nathan and others such as Justin, I know I can get through this. I am also struggling with feeling alone at times and feeling as if I want to be in a relationship. The idea of having someone there beside me to share moments with and to go out with seems great in my head. Then the idea of me not being in school hits me because I am slowly getting older and I am nowhere to being done with my education. I see my friends from high school about to graduate and close friends already having their set job for when they do graduate. This is not at all easy!
On another page I see God leading me towards The World Race. For those who aren’t familiar this is an 11 month journey to 11 different countries. Yes a very long mission trip but one that excites me when thought about. I had applied to it about 7 months ago but did not get the chance to partake in it. I was quite upset with the news but when thinking back I was still in a rut and was not in a full relationship with my Creator. We sometimes get so fired up about things that we don’t realistically think of what should and can be done. I now think and ponder how great God is because He knew that at that moment I was not ready to embark on an eleventh month journey. How in the world was I supposed to go out into the world when I could not even focus in on my mission here at home? I could not go out and share the Word with someone who I had no past with, had no culture in common and even more spoke a completely different language!
With time I knew this is why God had sent me back home. My family was in a way lost within their spiritual journey and God had chosen me to guide them back to Him. Evenmore He needed me to focus in on Him and prepare myself for my mission. A great memory I have while being back home is Christmas! I got my little brother and sister some presents like usual but I saved their best present for last; their personal bible! I wrote them a heartfelt message and as they both sat their with their tears making a map down their face, I knew that this year wait of no school was well worth this moment! I could feel the presence of God reign upon us as the peace of mind flooded the living room! I could see Him hugging us physically as well as spiritually. How great is our Heavenly Father when we invite Him into His party! No not the party of opening presents but the party we celebrate each year for His birth here on earth! Knowing that He steps into our life and my siblings life while they walk hand in hand is special! Since being back home my youngest sister Lizbeth has given her life to God!!! AMAZING!!! PRAISE JESUS!!!! Seeing her faith grow and trusting in God is something I am extremely proud of! My relationship with my youngest brother, Juan Manuel, is the best I have ever had! Growing up I never had a real good relationship with Him, but knowing that I have a blood brother that I can laugh and crack jokes with while still having our faith in between is also something I am grateful for! The relationship with my parents have also grown especially that of my dad! We talk more and laugh together more often! Prayers for Him are definitely in need as He is one I wish to see praising and worshipping God alongside everyone else in my family. My mom’s faith is ever so high as well as she is seeing God work through me! She can testify to the fruit that I am bearing and because of that God is reaching out to her as well!
SOOOOO…. CAN YOU SEE HOW GREAT GOD IS?!?!
It is literally amazing to see the blessings coming down and although at times I feel like I am in the valley, I know He is working! Currently like I have said I really ask all my prayer warriors to pray for my team and myself as we embark on our journey to the Dominican. Although I am already funded, I DO NOT WANT TO STOP THERE!!! If you would like to make any donations for others to get funded and/or for the building/church we are putting a roof on top of please let me know!!! Any amount is greatly appreciated! He who gives even a dollar with full faith and a humble heart will be greatly rewarded by our Heavenly Father! I also ask that you help me pray for my family and those friends around me that I will be sharing my faith with! In conclusion I ask that you pray for your friend DAVID (me)!!! haha This journey is by far the hardest but the most rewarding! Yes a journey because as I walk with God I want to keep learning about who He is and what my mission in life is about! I ask that you pray for clarity in what my next step should be whether it be school, Elevation Church Internship (shhhh) or the World Race.
For now I continue to press on to Jesus- my One and Only Rock! I press on and only realize that maybe He is making me wait because He wants me to learn that there’s no timeline for anything in life! Yes I might not be graduating this year but He is teaching me to not live life according to what society is expecting or even more what my parents are expecting. Maybe my lesson in this period is to let go of all these expectations, of timelines and of the notion that by a certain age I have to be more accomplished than those around me. Even more maybe I am still single because God is trying to teach my heart to hold on to its original Creator. The Creator that offers a different kind of love, the kind that you give to your friends, family and most importantly myself. Maybe he wants to plant the thought into my mind that I can live without the constant reassurance of a partner! Or even this- God wants me to know that my life will be spent traveling to different countries spreading His love and Word. Only He knows if I will be traveling, self-exploring and moving from one place to another. As He knows this He also knows that being tied up to a partner is not going to be the right fit for me.
God is mysterious but that is the best part of life! Thinking about this makes me ponder to the idea that maybe just maybe He is trying to teach me the art of trying, learning, letting go, and never giving up! All these are essential that I most likely would not learn from being comfortable and from being in one place. Add this on top of that list- maybe He wants me to just BE FREE! To not worry about timelines and to not be so obsessed with that idea because at the end of the day He knows that these don’t really represent who I am. They in turn weren’t made for me in the first place!
OR… MAYBE HE IS SIMPLY TEACHING ME HOW TO WALK BEFORE I RUN!!!!
Dear Lord, I freely give you my life and my time!
He who created me wears no watch and I should try doing the same! It’s your job God to control my life not mine! For now I know that my life is made up of different shades of colors and a full range of strokes and stripes! And at the end of the day now I know for a fact that He truly CREATED ME TO CREATE!!!!
