The morning I heard the news that Alex was dead, I was devastated. I was a lot of things, actually. Shocked. Overwhelmed. Discouraged. Homesick. Confused. Guilty. But I was not alone.
I walked back into our guest house and gathered the team together. I struggled through a short speech, staring at nowhere and no one and choking on words that I didn't have and couldn't find. I'd never lost someone so close, and I didn't know what to say. I didn't know what to do. I didn't even know how to feel. But I was not alone.
In a dark unadorned room in an almost unmarked guest house in a dusty distant corner of Kampala, Uganda, thousands of miles away from home, I was surrounded by family. They surrounded me with tears and hugs and prayers and love. Within two hours, our squad leaders had packed their bags with clothes still wet from laundry they'd done the night before and taken a taxi to my team to stay for a week. I was not alone.
The next morning, our contact, Joseph, came to our guest house to visit me. He took me outside and told me how touched he was about Alex's death. And then he said something I never expected: That he was going to leave his home — his wife, his five children and his church — for three days. That he was going to the side of a mountain. That he was going to fast from food and water for three days. That he was going to pray and intercede from my family. I was not alone.
That afternoon, Thomas stayed back at the guest house with me, and I had some time to pray and process all that had happened in the past 24 hours. I turned on a worship playlist and sat by myself in my room. I've never had a tangible experience with God (although I know many people who have), but I do know one thing: In that room, I was not alone.
I wasn't meant to do this alone.
You weren't mean to this alone.
We weren't meant to do this alone.
Imagine the grief of the disciples when Jesus died. They had left their jobs, their families, their homes, for Him. They had left them forever. He gave them no promises. He simply said "Follow me," and they simply did. And then, after three years, he was gone. But He promised that He would be with them to the end of the age (1) and that He would send His Spirit to be with them. So what did they do? They waited together. When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all in one place (2).
As the church grew, all who believed had all things in common (3). When one suffered, all suffered; when one was honored, all rejoiced (4). They shared each other's burdens (5).
As a church today, we become a Holy Temple of the Lord together(6); and together, we lift our voices as one to glorify Him (7).
We were meant to do this as one.
I wasn't at my sister's funeral, but I know what we do when someone dies in America.
We dress up and in black and listen to a homily. We stand around the ground and say goodbye. We go to a wake and eat and say we are sorry to the family. We don't know what else to say. We don't know what else to do.
So we leave.
Our team also held a funeral for Alex. We sat in a circle and worshipped God for bringing her into this world and for giving her to my family. We worshipped Him that He took her home. We prayed for my family and asked God to bless them as only He can. Then I kneeled on the grass and they all prayed for me.
Then we all left — together.
My prayer for you is that you have a body of believers around you who share with you in your struggles and successes.
My hope is that you know you are never alone.
(1) Matthew 28:20 — "And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age."
(2) Acts 2:1 — "When the day of Pentecost arrived, they were all together in one place"
(3) Acts 2:44: "And all who believed were together and had all things in common."
(4) 1 Corinthians 12:25-26 "That there may be no division in the body, but that themembers may have the same care for one another. If one member suffers, all suffer together; if one member is honored, all rejoice together."
(5) Galations 6:3 "Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."
(6) Ephesians 2:19-21 "So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the cornerstone, in whom the whole structure, being joined together, grows into a holy temple in the Lord."
(7) Romans 15:5-6 — "May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus, that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ."
