A few weeks ago we took a bus ride from Nairobi to Dar es Salaam.
Here’s a picture of what that experience can look like.
5:00am – wake up at Milimani backbackers. 
We’ve been sleeping in the back of a Safari truck for two nights
5:20am – The taxi shows up. The hostel’s pet dog, Scooby, almost
takes our taxi drivers arm off. We restrain Scooby with a snack and save
our drivers arm, thus enabling him to keep his ability to drive.
6:20am – We arrive at the bus station. Earlier in the month we took
an EZ Coach bus. It was terrible. I see the name on the side of the bus.
It’s not EZ Coach. I rejoice inside and raise my expectations for the
trip.
6:23am – I notice a white guy out of the corner of my eye and turn my
head to see him. It’s Tom Cruise. Or his younger brother. I smile and
nod and he flashes me a toothy Tom Cruise grin. Definitely a relative.
6:25am – Crowds are surrounding all the buses and we can’t tell
which one is ours. Michelle goes to ask inside. No real answers. Finally
we ask the man I front of the nearest bus. He points to the bus in
front of us. We rejoice and prepare to load our bags.
6:45am – We still haven’t loaded our bags. We’re standing around and
there’s a man in front of the bus door. He’s not doing anything. Neither
is anyone else. We decide to do nothing as well. Still waiting to load
the bags.
6:53am – People are starting to load the bus. I send Catherine and
Michelle to go get on. I’ll load the bags. Whenever that happens.
7:00am – It’s departure time for the bus, but we’re definitely not
departing. Finally time to load the bags. I rejoice. Finally the last
bag is loaded and I head to the door of the bus, just behind a woman
dressed in a green uniform.
7:01am – Catherine and Michelle are now off the bus. Green uniform
woman has told them we’re on the wrong bus. After our bags are already
loaded. I’m not rejoicing. I decide to go ask the man in front of the
first bus we saw. He points again to the bus we were just told to get
off. I go back to green uniform lady and tell her what he said. I
politely state that either he or she must be wrong and we need to know
which so we can board our bus. She looks at my ticket again and decides
it’s ok. We all get back on the bus. The luggage doesn’t have to be
moved. I nearly rejoice.
7:05am – We’re seated on the bus. So is Tom. We find out he’s from
North Carolina and out here to do medical work. I know it’s just a cover
and he’s probably on some crazy impossible mission but I nod like I
believe him.
7:30am – The bus finally starts to make noises and moves out of the
station. We’re on our way. Goodbye Nairobi, hello 18 hour bus trip to
Dar es Salaam.
7:50am – We’ve hit dusty roads. The trip’s been comfortable so far. A
man in a black hat comes to the back of the bus. I think he works for
the bus company. He opens my window and cold air and dust start flying
into my face. I make a note mentally to thank him for his kindness.
7:51am – Black hat is back at the front of the bus again. I close my
window. Air is still blowing in my face from the window by the seat in
front of me. A man in a white hat sitting in front of me closes that
window. I can tell we are going to be allies. All is comfortable again.
8:45am – Black hat returns and opens my window again. I ask him why
he needs the window open. He grunts a few syllables that I’m fairly sure
were neither English nor Swahili and puts his phone to his ear. I know
that tactic. He leaves and I close my window again. A few minutes later
white hat closes his window again too. The game is on.
10:15am – We hit the border of Tanzania and
have to get off the bus and go through immigration. First we have to go
through customs. Tom Cruise is in line across the room from us. We get a
short line and move through quick. He’s still there when we leave.
10:19am – We get to the other building to get our passports stamped.
Catherine and I are near the front of the line. Tom Cruise comes in and
gets in a different line. It’s a race now. He gets to the counter and
gets done within minutes. He must have figured the system out. He’s Tom
Cruise.
10:40am – We finally get someone to talk to us. I get my passport
stamped.
10:55am – They finally call Catherine up to get her passport stamped.
The bus has been driving back and forth on the road. Michelle’s keeping
them from leaving without us. We finally head out to get back on and
they drive off. They stop about 40 feet in front of us. We run up and
they apologize and let us back on.
11:37am – We stop at a security checkpoint and security men walk
around the bus looking at the storage compartments. I worry for a minute
about my guitar and hope they don’t start rummaging through things and
tossing them around. One boards the bus and walks to the back, looking
stoically at everyone as he passes. Then he gets off and we move again.
12:02pm – A man in a white shirt starts walking back opening windows
on the bus. He gets to my window. I stop him and ask why they need to
open windows. He smiles at me and says “air condition”. Then he opens my
window and moves on. I already know the condition of the air. Cold and
dusty. I give up on the window and leave it open. White hat seems to
have given up too. If he closes it I’ll close mine. We’re in this
together.
12:04pm – We hit nice roads.
12:15pm – Catherine and I sleep as best we can.
3:13pm – We watch Minority Report in honor of Tom Cruise. The laptop
dies less than halfway through.
4:05pm – We drive.
4:47pm – There are white stripes in the center of the road. It’s
probably the first time we’ve seen actual lane separations since Asia.
6:30pm – Still driving.
7:08pm – Michelle loses her glasses, she’s now looking through her
bag to find her backup glasses so she can see enough to find her newer
glasses.
12:14am – We arrive in Dar es Salaam, ready to be back on solid
ground!
I took
notes to help me remember our adventures and times, but also to show you
how bumpy an African bus is. I promise, my handwriting is a least
slightly better than this normally.
