You know what’s really frustrating…indecision. I feel like I have more of that in my life than ever before. I can’t seem to make up my mind about anything, and I mean anything. I have a million questions floating around in my head and I have no idea what the answers are, and for some reason or another I don’t hear an answer from the Lord. I believe most of this is just because He wants me to learn patience, but at month 8 on the world race I’m running down. I’ll just be honest. I’m tired. Emotionally I’m tired, spiritually I’m excited and tired, and physically I am most definitely tired. A lot of people said South Africa was a month of rest and rejuvenation, but I don’t really think it was for me. It was a testing ground though.
I believe the Lord wanted to see if I could still seek him in a setting which was so similar to the States it wasn’t funny, and I found I could, even more so than I can in a tent in Thailand. I feel ready for America, and yet I still have 3 more months to go on the race after this one. It’s not that I want out at all or that I’m done, it’s just that I’m ready. But I know the Lord still has a lot to teach me on this trip to further equip me for when I get home. I’ve found that the only thing that keeps me going isn’t the love and support I get from my team members or family, but the love I receive straight from the Lord spoken through the Holy Spirit. I literally would fall apart I believe if it wasn’t for Him. Sometimes though my mind is so full I don’t think to ask Him for anything, but thankfully the Father is always thinking about me and will use others to reach me if He can’t Himself.
Yesterday I was given a word from a friend of how the Father spoke to them about me. The person said that during a personal time of prayer the Lord stopped mid conversation and turned to look at me and then said to the person “I really love Dave, like I really love him.� Just when I was feeling beaten down and tired the Lord comes along and fills me back up again just by saying He loves me. I guess I’m a cheap date, but I don’t know what else you could want than to be told the Father really loves you personally. I’ve been so distracted recently by the busyness around me that I haven’t spent much personal time with the Lord, and I miss Him. Do you ever feel like that? Like you just really miss your best friend? The best part is He’s always waiting for you to come back. He’s just a word away.
So what’s this all about? Nothing. There’s no point to this blog besides to tell you what’s really going on in this noggin. I’ll type out a blog about our South Africa ministry and our Thailand ministry soon, but I thought it would be more important to tell you my personal journey. I guess I do more of that in my blogs anyway. Sorry for not being more detailed about the ministries I’ve been working with, but I see blogs as like a public journal, and I don’t write about ministry in my journal. So that’s my bad. Please continue to pray for me. Pray for strength and rejuvenation. Pray for more heavenly fire. I want to end on a positive note, so let’s make it an A — AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. Just kidding. I am having tons of fun here in Thailand. This place is beautiful and so are the people. This month Team Waka is paired up with Team Transformers 2:12 and we’re laughing our heads off all the time, so no worries. Thanks for keeping up with this crazy journey. God bless.
