so, I have this friend. Whose more of a sister than a friend. Someone I take pride in knowing. Someone that reflects Jesus in real and raw ways. Someone I thank God for placing in my life. Someone I wish I knew 18 years ago, but someone I’m lucky to know now. Someone that so randomly ended up in my life. Someone that somehow found the way to encourage and uplift me from 18 hours away.
you may know her.
you may not.
she is,
Taylor Marie Kimbrough.
and she is exuberant.
I’m extremely lucky to know Taylor. I mean that.
Taylor, along with some girls you also may have heard of in previous blogs or have seen on social media, Lillabea and Thyme are some of the girls i’ve gotten closest to during this season of life. I’ve spent a little over a month and a half (including travel days, debriefs and LDW) with Taylor. 2 months with Thyme, and the entirety of the race up until now with Lillabea.
The sisterhood, that God has blessed me with is extraordinary and unlike anything i’ve ever experienced. I feel ineffably understood. I couldn’t explain it if I had the chance to. Understood. Loved. Seen. Known. Cherished. All things that Lillabea, Thyme, and Taylor all make me feel deeply.
I’m not sure i’ve ever met women that exude the love of the Lord in such ways as Taylor, Thyme and Lillabea. New, refreshing and exciting ways. Some ways incomprehensible. Tangible, living, breathing, hallelujahs. Women that so evidently walk in the freedom of the king of all kings. I am privileged to have such God fearing sisters in my life, that uplift and encourage me in ways that prompt my spirits to lift, even if they are miles and miles from me.
For the first time since the race, our teams are splitting up. I’m no longer within arms distance of Lillabea, as i’ve been for the entirety of our time abroad. I no longer have the comfort of my best friends. The sweet things that make our friendship unique and special, as well as my friends themselves are in opposite sides of south africa than I. I believe the Lord made our friendships unshakeable, so it’s not the change of friendship i’m concerned about. I also don’t doubt all of the beautiful things I will learn in my time apart from them, but More so how far away the comfort of my girls is from myself. Pretoria to Hiedleburg and Hiedleburg to Johannesburg. A long ways away. The Lord has used the three of them to grow and stretch me, and i’m extremely thankful to have had them apart of this season of my life. But now, month 5 & 6 – are different. And full of change.
but… like I said, I am privileged to have such God fearing sisters in my life, that uplift and encourage me in ways that prompt my spirits to lift, even if they are miles and miles from me.
Taylor, before she got off the bus and hugged me goodbye, handed me an envelope of letters.
And on the envelope read
“everyone needs a reminder of who they are & how they’re loved. I cherish you. may these notes bring something you need to hear! Jesus, reveal dasia’s potential and life through these words, i know you cherish her more than the stars. I know you’ve created her to be light, to be rare, to fight.”
I asked her when i should open them and how many at a time and she left it all up to me. “whenever. however many you want, whenever you need them.”
Today, after a long few first days, I felt it only appropriate to open a letter.
Before I tell you what the letter read, I want you, Taylor, if you’re reading this very blog post, to know that these words have provided my lonely misunderstood last few days with hope. Knowing, and peace in the sense that JESUS understands me.
answered prayers really, so hallelujah to that.
And for you, the eyes that read this. If you also, feel misunderstood and alone in the sense that man fails to know you, see you, or understand you in the slightest, I pray that you feel conviction in these words – that you know that, Jesus understands you.
“when you’re misunderstood, remember Jesus, being God, on the cross, being spit on, blamed, humiliated by the people HE CREATED, the God who controls the ocean, spoke dust into life was the MOST misunderstood being to exist. He experienced the hell of being misunderstood. so he could UNDERSTAND grief, and pain. Dasia He understands.”
Being far from people who truly understand me is hard. Maybe you reading this don’t even have people you feel understood by. I know, it’s hard. It’s not easy feeling alone in this, but better than anyone on this planet earth, Jesus, understands exactly what it is you’re feeling. He endured the pain that we feel. For no other reason than because He loves us. The humiliation, and blame that the weight of the world nailed into His hands; was carried on his very own back, all the way to golgotha, and should’ve taken its last breaths as He did when He gave himself up for US. Unreal. Undeserving we are, yet, it’s already finished. Jesus, is so much for us. But what does it look like to press into the gift of life it is we’re given everyday. To press into the simple fact that we no longer have to carry the weight of shame, and loneliness in our misunderstandings. That Jesus, did that FOR US. What does it look like to allow ourselves to be fully known and understood by the creator of our earth, not only that, but of ourselves. To live freely in the freedom that we’ve been given, because of JESUS. To be fully satisfied and content with the fact that, He is enough. It’s a PRIVILEGE to be a child of God, and i’m learning what it looks like to let that be enough for me.
I can only pray you begin to learn the same.
