Well I’ve been telling everyone how busy I’ve been and how I haven’t been able to write any blogs recently…… but here I am. Given the perfect opportunity while I rest from a bellyache after snacking on a chicken foot.
I’ve spent the past couple days trying to gather my thoughts and figure out how to explain where my heart is at right now.
Entering this trip, I was carrying a lot of pain from shame and guilt from my past. I was thirsty for a community filled with positivity. I was struggling with forgiveness. I was seeking my purpose. I had lost track of who I really was. And I was desperate for a new beginning.
This past summer was rough. Easily the worst season of my life when it comes to the choices I made, my priorities, my responsibilities, and my obedience to God through my actions, my heart posture, and my mouth.
Through the first month of this trip, God stripped me down and tore off everything that I had put my identity in. My plans that were not His plans were taken right from underneath my feet. God began the process of tearing me down to prepare me for the women He is building me back up to be.
He has brought healing and forgiveness in my life, not only for the people who have hurt me but for myself as well. I went through one of the hardest conversations of my life to live out the healing and forgiveness that God has given me. I have truly forgiven the people who have hurt me physically and emotionally.
He has broken the chains of my shame and guilt and brought freedom in my life.
He has reset my heart on the things I am most passionate about.
He has opened my eyes to see His goodness.
He has brought clarity and understanding to why He does things the way He does.
He‘s revealed Himself in my darkest days.
I can officially say I have entered a new season of pressing into the Lord and begin truly living out the life He has ordained for me. This will be a season of growth, learning, trust, reliance, dedication, sacrifices, selflessness, and obedience.
…….I am ready.
