Have you ever walked into a waterfall?
The only sound you can hear is the water and it is really hard to see. This season has felt a lot like standing in a waterfall. my sight of the lord is difficult and so is hearing His voice. There are many times in life that we get the choice to allow our own will in life and we choose to shut the lord out of our hearts.
z
My season is of tempering! This is a process in which a piece of metal is cooled down in oil to harden the blade to its maximum strength. In my heart this last couple of weeks the lord has been distant and hard for me to hear, hard for me to seek, and it’s been difficult to battle my wandering mind. I feel the brittle stage of tempering in my life right now. Like metal if you place it in cold oil or water the metal will shatter and become useless. Much like how I feel in my walk right now the tempering! I am at a very crucial position in my walk with the father. I feel the pressure to make sure that my mind does not get the control over my heart and to allow the faith that the lord has given me to be my guide. The path is narrow and I have had so much spiritual battle leading into this battle season of trial and tempering. I have a hard time each day to choose into community and to press into the love for others. My heart is hard to feel and it is really hard to constantly choose to be around people each day pressing into loving them when I am finding it hard to love myself in this season of trial.
I don’t want this to scare you into thinking that I am in a place that Is bad or ugly. For I know by our obedience our father God will place us in His will. The truth about this season is I feel the need to share with you, the reality of struggle I am going though so that you can help in prayer and have insight on what is going on in my heart. I know God has greater plans and through pain we grow In deeper understanding and new depths of relationship with our father reveals itself. The hard thing in this season is to find myself in constant community when I feel the need to spend a few days alone with God and not having a choice to make it happen. I am in a constant season of battle and I find it hard each day to press in. God will deliver us what we deserve by what we have chosen to endure. I have this constant reminder of the story in the bible about the talents. If we are given one talent and return one talent, we have gained nothing! I feel the lord has given me many talents and I am choosing to multiply them and I feel that being a good and faithful servant is not an easy path filled with easy seasons. God is and will be forever good and working for our good!
I wanted to let you all into my heart and into this season that I am going though in life right now thank you all for your prayers and encouragement in my walk with the lord. A season is only for a short time and the lord is showing me a lot in this tough season of my walk in the kingdom.
JAMES 2:17
(Faith alone isn’t enough unless it produces good deeds)
