Ministry
Update: This month was our Ask The Lord (ATL) Month. We went to Split,
Croatia for two weeks working with an American missionary. We
attended to the coffee shop he runs as a means to support the church. He also takes advantage of the coffee culture and uses the cafe as an outreach. For us that meant making coffee, selling giant fresh
baked American style chocolate chip cookies, and making friends with
the students who came by (which happened to be few). For our last week
here in Croatia, we headed off for the Island of Korcula, where we are
helping repair a hostel. Our ministry is the local owner, a
non-Christian, who we hangout with all day everyday. By the way, his name is Dragan, please be praying for him!
Month 10 on the race…ATL month…Eastern Europe. Knowing this was our ATL month I went in with high expectations. We felt God leading us to go to Croatia, and He made it all possible! We stumbled upon cool unique contacts, even offering free lodging! God obviously has something big in store for us…right?
But what does that mean, God has something big in store for us? In the mind of Danny Stinson…that means people getting saved. We were gonna head to Split, Croatia and people were going to come to know Jesus. Heck, maybe even revival would break out! When I think about God doing something big in my life, it always revolves around people coming to know God. My heart is burdened for it. Nothing breaks my heart more than the thought of people spending their lives without Jesus. I’ve seen poverty, sickness, and oppression…but honestly the hardest thing for me is seeing so many lost people…so blinded by the world…with Jesus nowhere in sight and no desire to find Him.
Why God? Why don’t you move? Why are so many people stuck in this meaningless mirage of life, driven by money or status or reputation…completely unaware that life will pass them by and they will die without even the semblance of meaning.
I barraged God with this question a lot the first two weeks in Croatia. I wanted Him to speak to me and tell me exactly what each person needed to hear that would open their eyes to the truth of the Gospel. It didn’t happen. I met friends…John, Damir, Andrea, and others…I prayed that they Holy Spirit would sweep over them and change their lives forever. We had some great conversations…but nothing dramatic. Nothing worth writing a story about. And I got frustrated. My soul grew anxious and weary. I began to doubt God’s voice in my life. Do I even hear from God? Or have I been making everything up for the past 9 months? That first week in Split was tough. I didn’t laugh a lot. I wasn’t very joyful. My heart was heavy and peace ceased to guide my life. My insides often felt trapped as if in a straitjacket. I wondered where the abundant life that Jesus promised, and that I had enjoyed so much of this year, had disappeared to…
So I sought Him. I locked myself away from people and cried out. “God, I’m going to sit here and be silent until you talk to me. I can’t handle the frustration, the angst, anymore. So I’m going to sit here until I hear you voice.” I heard God’s voice that day. I did the same thing the next day. And the next. And you know what…? It became easier and easier to hear His voice. All of a sudden it wasn’t such a struggle to quiet myself, it wasn’t as difficult to be patient and wait…He spoke some big things to me. Can you believe it? I still have more sanctification to come in my life!
The bell tower inside of the 3rd Century Palace of Diocletian
One of the most important things He said, is a simple yet profound truth. It seems to dissipate from my memory at times…I know I am not alone in this struggle.
A goal I had for the Race was to walk each moment in step with the Holy Spirit. However, on the Race you are always doing “ministry” and it’s easy to compartmentalize your life-Finished up my hours of ministry, God is pleased with me thank you very much. Now I can go on autopilot and do whatever suits me best.
We can turn off the voice of the Holy Spirit, or at the very least ignore it. Instead of asking how we can love God and others, we (or should I say “I”), return to my self-centered thoughts. What do I want, what will make me happy at this moment?
This month, I didn’t have ministry helping me feel good about myself. I couldn’t use what I was DOING to feel worthy before God. And it’s good. Because in the end..what you do does not matter. Christ and living a Spirit-filled life moment by moment, that is what matters. The month became practice for living back home…there is no “ministry mode” to turn on. God reminded me that the Christian life is not asking what God wants to say or do when I’m doing “ministry.” No, it’s each moment asking God how I can love and serve the person next to me. No more compartmentalizing my life, but a free flow of true life funneled though relationship with Christ. Every moment. Every day. Whether I am working at an orphanage in the Philippines, or I am flipping burgers back home…my attitude and mentality should never change.
“For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision or uncircumcision counts for anything, but only FAITH expressing itself in LOVE.” ~ Galations 5:6
The primary physical or outward expression and manifestation of covenant with God was circumcision. But now that means nothing…Paul is saying that all outward expressions on a surface level count for NOTHING. What matters is on the inside, unseen with human eyes. It’s faith expressing itself in love. So if I don’t truly love people, or have the love of God flowing through me, my “ministry” counts for nothing. I can share the Gospel all I want. I can help as many hungry, sick people that I can find. And it would mean nothing. Check out 1 Corinthians 13 if you dont believe me. The proof that matters, that shows my intimacy and closeness with God is living truly loving others from the inside out.
Me and the boys down on the “Riva” in Split.
