There I was, sitting in the airport in Istanbul, Turkey after flying all night from Atlanta. J squad had an 8 hour layover and I felt irritated. It wasn’t because of the time between flights or because we wouldn’t be heading out until 2 AM or the fact that I didn’t sleep much on the plane. It could have been that after preparing and working for 70 hours a week, I wasn’t as thrilled and excited anymore. I said goodbye to my friends and family for 11 months to say hello to the adventure that God planned for me, I expected to feel exuberant. I was so confused! So, I prayed, “Father, why do I feel so irritated and frustrated?”
Before I applied to the World Race, I asked God for 4 things:
Travel the world using my hands to build relationships worldwide.
Know how to travel the world safely and economically.
Build meaningful and lifelong friendships with those who seriously pursue God and who are willing to do anything for Him out of love.
To not to have any unreasonable expectations for the this trip.
The Race was the key to answers.
The feeling in the Istanbul airport followed me all the way into Lesotho and I kept asking God and myself why. When I looked back on my 4 requests I saw that the third one wasn’t coming into the picture. I thought with the hours of travel time that I would actually get to know my squad mates well. As I continued to reflect I knew I put myself out there and thought I asked good questions and thought I was genuinely interested in them. But it didn’t seem to matter. I received very little interest in much of anything I had to say. To my surprise, I was ticked off! “Why doesn’t anyone seem to care about my efforts to create friendships!?” I thought to myself. You could definitely see it on my face. (Later on I found out that wasn’t true and people actually appreciated it.) So the next thing I did was just stop trying; hoping someone would notice my seclusiveness. Like a kid playing a game of hide and seek, without anyone knowing they are playing. I came out from my hiding place frustrated that no one was looking for me.
As I kept digging into the reason of my frustration, I found the root of the issue; the desire to be fully known.
At home I have plenty of people who know me well and care very deeply about me. Once I stepped onto that plane to Turkey I left that familiar comfort behind. I desperately needed to be known inside and out.
Through that desperation, being a sign of something that needed attention, God said, “I am your friend and I know you through and through, Daniel.” and I said, “Oh… Will you be my best friend, Jesus?” “Of course, Daniel. I love you so much.” “Thank you Lord for showing me my weaknesses so that we may grow closer together. Love you too!”
When I put God into that role in my life, something awesome occurred. He blessed me with countless in-depth conversations and deep friendships with my squad mates.
I’m still learning what it means to be a friend to Jesus but I guess that’s what a life is for, right?
If you ever wonder what God thinks about you read my favorite chapter in the Bible; Psalm 139. Also, if you are thinking of going on the World Race pray against expectations. You won’t regret it.
Please leave me a comment on what you thought or found helpful or thinking I could do better on. Thanks for reading!
