Update: We are currently staying in Xenacoj, Santo Domingo, Sacatepequez, Guatemala working with orphans and widows in the community. Here’s a flashback to El Salvador…
“Remember where you are.” It’s so humbling to be reminded of the realities that surround us that we can’t even see. Two weeks ago we met with a missionary named Rachel. Rachel works for a ministry that trains people to live out their theology in real and tangible ways. She has a huge heart for Spanish, immigrants, and justice. She shared with us about many of the realities of what dailiness looks like in El Salvador for so many of the people.
“Every time you see yellow tape,” she told us, “someone was just murdered.” It’s a sobering reality. Rachel added, “Everytime I see yellow tape, I pause and think, ‘remember where you are.'” It’s so easy to get desensitized to it and become comfortable. The reality of the country of El Salvador is a long history of oppression and atrocities, horrible dictatorships, injustices, a brutal civil war whose shadow hangs heavily over the lives of the people here, and a culture of gang violence that governs the great majority of people’s lives. Rachel explained to us how most small businesses and taxi drivers pay extortions to the gangs, just to protect their lives. This means up to two thirds of their income is not actually going to feed their families at all. People don’t take buses after 6pm unless they want trouble. “You don’t mess with these people,” Rachel said solemnly. They are brutal, violent, and not afraid to go to extreme ends to get what they want.
It’s amazing to me how we can be in this country for almost month and have no idea that the people all around us are living in constant fear and oppression. There is this unspoken subculture of an understanding of the situation and the violence that really caught me by surprise. Just recently the statistics showed El Salvador as the most violent country in the world, surpassing Honduras. What a sobering reality to walk the streets of poverty and oppression and not even really see it.
I’m thankful for Rachel and her honesty and willingness to share with us about what goes on underneath the surface around here. About how when that bus gets assaulted, the mother who is on the way back from the bank has to hand over her entire month’s food budget for her family. This situation is desperate, bleak, and not on the verge of getting much better. So what does it look like to bring light and hope in the midst of that when we’ve never had to live under such fear and pressure? Sobering indeed.
Yellow tape moments come from watching movies like Sin Nombre and being forced to grapple with the humanity of those being recruited into the gangs. We watched this movie as a team and spent the night taking prayer shifts and interceding for the oppressed and the oppressors in this violent country. There is something very human about desiring belonging, acceptance, and protection which is the story of so many young people who are being forced to join gangs far before they understand the reality of the lifestyle they are walking into.
A few days ago, Ashley and I were standing at the front desk of the hostel asking Yessenia about her family, her life, her job. We went from joking around to a sudden story of how Yessenia was stopped on a bus on her way to work last month and forced to give the gang members everything she had on her. She only brings exact change to get to and from work, so she gave them her dollar. Yellow Tape.This happened to her three times in the same week.
Oscar, the twenty year old security guard with the innocent eyes, told us he lost his brother to “la delicuencia” two years ago. Yellow tape.
As I stared out into the darkness all I could think about were those big chocolate brown eyes and the little arms that wrapped around my waist just a few days before, and the giant gang sign painted on the wall of that little village. The tears came as I thought about my little Fernando, his surprise hugs, and his reality. He’s a seven year old by growing up in the tension of poverty and gang culture. Yellow Tape. It’s too much for me to bear.
After our night long prayer watch, Ashley and I were standing on the roof watching the sunrise. I read Isaiah 58 out loud…the words floated into the yellow orangish rays of light that sprung forth before our eyes. What a tangible reminder of the hope that is in Christ Jesus and the promises He has made to His people. “Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the Lord will be your rearguard. Then you will call, and the Lord will answer; you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I,” (Isaiah 58: 8-9).
Please pray that the Lord would continually remind my team of the hope that He offers in the midst of such horrible realities. Please pray that Jesus would direct me to specific people so I can participate in what the Lord is stirring in their hearts. So often I get overwhelmed by the needs that are so tangible and evident around me. Please pray that I would follow the guidance of the Holy Spirit in the little daily assignments He has for me, while not forgetting the beauty of the big picture.
