One month from today I will be in Washington D.C. about to train a bit more before my squad and I leave for Costa Rica. I think back to 9 months ago when I committed to doing this trip, I didn’t feel like this trip would ever come. Reality was nowhere near me and I was just so stoked to have this opportunity to serve God’s people all over the world.
9 months ago, it was a dream.
Right now it is reality.
I cannot even describe the emotions that I have been feeling throughout the last few weeks. One minute I would be stoked on life, belting out Christmas music at the top of my lungs, eating cookie dough, and snuggling with my dog and then literally two seconds later I am crying my eyes out. I mean, I graduated with a Psychology degree and I cannot even figure out what’s going on with me. As crazy as I feel, I have realized that this is all part of the adventure.
I am not normally one to cry very much…well except for those occasional times watching Monsters Inc. or when something happens to someone I love, but these last couple months has been crazy. It is just hard for me to think about leaving so many people I love for 11 months, and my heart hurts sometimes because of it.
But something I have to remember is that I got to choose to go on this trip. I have the CHOICE to go on such an amazing experience. Yes, it’s going to be one of the hardest things I have ever done, but I have to remember that I will get to meet some of the most beautiful people. And some of these people will have never seen the light of Christ and I get a chance to show them. And love them like I have been loved. You see, they don’t have a choice to just get up and leave their tough situations. I mean it will be really hard to see what we are going to see, but we are just there temporarily, but these people… this is their lives. So even though I am all over the scale, emotion-wise, I have to remember that we have this amazing opportunity to meet them where they are at in life and become a part of their lives.
And even though I seem to be stuck riding an emotional roller-coaster that never ends, I have never felt more ALIVE.
