Life is a journey, every chapter, an adventure and ifI don't take it one step at a time I will probably explode with overload. Getting to this current chapter has been a huge adventure, so how did I get here? Why postpone my last year of school to travel around the world and share about Jesus and what he did on the cross? There were many chapters leading up to this, however the first one was when I was in the seventh grade.
I grew up in the church and became a christian at a young age. So when I was in the seventh grade, I was attending my friend Ashley's youth group. One night we met and there was a guest speaker who was a missionary. Listening to her speak about her experiences, I developed a passion for missions; I knew I was going to be a missionary. When we broke into small groups i burst into tears due to excitement and everyone looked at me like I had an extra limb. I didn't really care. I went on my first mission when i was a freshman in high school. My church made a trip down to Hermosillo, Mexico and once I was there I was hooked. I fell in love with the people, the culture, and simply seeing God move through me and the people in Hermosillo. I had fallen in love and went back every opportunity I had.
The next chapter that lead to this was this past summer in the Mountains of Wyoming. I was a camp counselor in Jackson Hole, WY and there I met some of the most amazing people I have ever come in contact with. When the summer ended I kept in contact with my fellow counselors and one night I decided to do what most college students do and get on facebook. One of my fellow counselors was on so I decided to chat. We got to talking and he started to talk to me about this trip he was going on… the world race. This sounded just like me. Leave school (temporarily) and travel around the world doing missions… it sounded amazing. Then it came up that I should apply. My stomach lurched. Excuse me stomach, we should be excited… what is wrong? This is something that I've wanted to do for years, why am i freaking out? I decided homework could wait and went to do a devotion out of the book called, Experiencing God (great bible study if you want to do it) Anyway, my devotional was about Moses and how he was called into Egypt even though he was incredibably nervous about it. Hmmm… then I get home from the library and my roommate tells me she'll help me with the application fee. Hmmm… I started to get really excited. I knew about the race for three hours and I already felt like God was telling me, "GO!" But then there was the lurch, the "what if's" knocking on my door. People asked me, "what if this…", "what if that…" and all for the "what if's" began to instill doubt. Doubt that I wasn't making the right decision, doubt I wasn't heraring God, doubt that it wouldn't come together. I didn't know what to do or where to go. So I stopped everything and read James 1:5-6 "But if any of you needs wisdom you should ask God for it He is generous to everyone and will give you wisdom without criticizing you. But when you ask God you must believe and not doubt. Anyone who doubts is like a wave in the sea, blown up and down by the wind" My mindset was all wrong. It wasn't about "what if", it was about "what IS". What IS God telling me? What IS God putting in front of me? I have been asking God questions non-stop, had i once listened? I needed to change my mindset. So what was God saying here? I stopped worrying about the future and listened to what God was saying to me now. Not everything made sense, yet it was still clear. Therefore I just needed to focus on what God was saying. The "what if's didn't matter. I truly feel that God IS calling me to go. So I'm going. I don't have all the "what if's answered, but there is no doubt in my mind that this IS the time. NO matter what "if's" come on my path. So here I am, getting ready to venture on the world race. There is still a lot that I'm sure I will experiance and need to learn, however I'm ready to take on the next few chapters. I'm ready to stop listening to the "what if's"; change the mindset from "what if" to "what IS".
