My
favorite part of our house is the kitchen and sunroom area. Don’t get me wrong, we have the best
red couches in town and my bed is beautiful, but there’s something about our
kitchen table and the wide-open windows of the surrounding sunroom that make it
my favorite. I love how the light
beams through the shades, how the glass table clinks when you put something
down on it, and how the coolness of the tile floors feels on the bottom of my
feet. I love that this is the room
where people tend to gather when they first come to visit. And, I LOVE how it smells when my
roommate is baking!!! It could be
all these things that make it my favorite. Or, it might also be because this is where I come to meet
with my Father on those quiet mornings when I actually take advantage of the
stillness of the day.
Today,
I followed my current morning routine…coffee, 2 eggs over easy, and yogurt
(this week I’m trying Greek yogurt…not a fan of the texture but I’m too aware
of my money right now to throw it away!). Normally, I would plop down on the couch and turn the T.V. on to watch
whatever DVR episode I missed the night before. But today I stopped at the glass table. Today, I wanted to sit with my
Father. I like to sit in the chair
against the wall and He always sits in the chair to my right. The windows are in the same direction
and I imagine they would cast beautiful light behind Him if He were really
seated there. I began to drink my
coffee and eat my breakfast whilst I wondered how He would take His
coffee. Would He be a cream and
sugar guy or just straight black? Would He want me to get for Him or would He just point to His mug and
speak it into existence? I gazed
in His direction hoping He could read my mind and see the desire my heart has
for Him without having to explain it. I imagine God smiles a lot, so I always end each gaze with a smile back
at Him.
Today
I felt no shame before Him, no guilt, no judgment. He loves me and today I believed Him when He told me. I
began to speak, out loud, yes. I
started by telling Him how satisfying He is and how “enough” He is for me. I told Him that I loved Him too and
that I trust Him. And then I began
pouring my heart out to Him, telling Him all that I wanted in this life He’s
given and asking Him to change anything that wasn’t what He wanted for me
too. Sometimes I can feel Him
literally press His thumb to my heart and it begins to gush. He keeps me tender and honest with Him
that way.
As
I was talking through tears (and snot) something caught my eye outside the
window. A bird was hopping around
on the grass. This is not unusual
for our backyard. There seem to
always be birds, squirrels, our beloved bunnies, or a stray cat here and there
moving around. But today, as I
watched this tiny bird peck at the ground, I wondered what she might be
gathering. Was it food for her
babies or leaves for her nest? Did
she always come to our yard or was this her first time stopping by? All I knew was that whatever she was
looking for, she would find. She
would find it because God also knew what she needed and He cares for her
because He made her.
I
remembered a verse that I heard a long time ago in a song by Sandi Patty. I know, I know…Sandi Patty isn’t the
current Christian music trendsetter, but I grew up singing her songs at the top
of my lungs! She taught me how to
move my voice and use vibrato. And
this morning all I could think about was the hymn she used to sing His Eye Is
On The Sparrow. I began flipping
through my Bible to find the verses and then read them over and over again!
Psalm
84:3 “Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself,
where she may have her young- a place near your altar, LORD Almighty, my King
and my God.”
Matthew
10:29 “Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to
the ground outside your Father’s care.
Luke
12:7 “Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid;
you are worth more than many sparrows.”
What
a loving Father! If He is caring
for the birds, meeting their needs, knowing their purpose, providing and loving
them, is He not all the more aware of His children? Does He not want to meet every one of my needs, every small
desire of my heart? If His eyes
watch over the sparrow, then I know He watches me! My God does not want me to sit and wait forever, He wants to
give me all that I desire and even more! What father doesn’t want to give their child everything? What love, what incredible love!
I
of course then went searching for the song on iTunes and immediately bought it
and played it 3 times back to back! This incredible joy filled my heart! When Sandi gets to the part “I sing because I’m happy. I sing because I’m free!” you better
believe I stood up in the middle of the sunroom, windows open, trees blowing,
leaves raining down, and more birds than have ever been in our yard at one time
fluttering around and I sang! I
sang, and I sang, and I sang! I
spun around throwing my hands in the air and sang! I felt completely loved, completely free, and completely
taken care of! And then I laughed! I giggled because all I could think of at that moment was Snow White and
how she danced and sang in the forest! She whistled, and sang, and kissed all the little animals. Maybe Snow White knew how loved she
was. Maybe she sang because she
was free too! Maybe she knew that
someone was watching her and wanted to give her every desire of her heart! Maybe Snow White had just had breakfast
at a glass table with her Father!
“How
great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we might be called
children of God.” 1 John 3:1
As
I think of what is laying in front of me and my Wellspring team, I am joyful to
know that MY God sees me and He sees the men, women, and children of Cambodia,
Thailand, India, and Atlanta and cares for them! He wants to give them every desire of their hearts. He wants them to know His love. He wants to restore their lives, their
beauty, and their hope! And He
will do it!!!
