The Holy Spirit is my Co-Leader
Hey pretty people. Get ready to hear a story that can only describe how magnificent our Lord is. I am going to share how the Lord brought me into this space of leading and what he has done in me already.
While I was still in CGA (Center for Global Action) I had a burning desire to lead people. I wanted to pour out what I had been soaking up for so long. I was desiring a season of giving away and igniting other people’s walk with the Lord. As I was desiring this, i had a feeling it would look a lot more long term and a lot further down the road.
About a month and a half ago I was pulled aside by some leadership at AIM and was asked to pursue leading a Spring Semesters trip. I had been approached with this information and desire a week before I went home for Christmas and a month and a half before I would have to leave.
Instantly I knew it was from the Lord and also knew I had to do it.
But I said no.
I pursued it half heartedly and even didn’t reply to a few emails for a couple weeks. I knew it was right but everything in me was petrified out of fear. Fear of what my people back home would think. Fear if I wasn’t ready. Fear that I was hearing the voice of the Lord wrong.
A little over 2 weeks ago I woke up with my heart pounding and I knew I was running away from the Lord and what he had so clearly laid out before me. That night I sent in my application and prayed. Prayed hard. I was given peace to replace my fear and vision to replace my doubt.
2 weeks ago I had my phone interview and left the conversation with the leadership of Semesters leaning towards putting me on the Africa route. I prayed after the phone interview and instantly knew if I didn’t get placed in leadership over the Philippines route, I would have to say no. It was the only route I had peace about even though I have a HUGE heart for the countries in Africa. In my soul and my spirit and my entire being I knew the Lord was telling me Philippines.
When I got my call back an hour later I was told there wasn’t peace about me leading Africa anymore, but instead there was immense peace with me leading Philippines.
Ummmm hello God?!?! Wow.
I instantly knew the Lord had given me the biggest green light and the most solid confirmation I could have received to know this was the right thing.
I began to prepare my heart and my mind to tell my people I was leaving later that week and that I wouldn’t be home for 3 months. I spent many hours that week packing, shopping, gathering, praying, visiting people, and just getting my mind to shift gears completely.
All this while, I am also trying to now help recruit a co-leader for me. I called Ky and the Lord ended up using her “yes!” for a different route. I called many other people too and all resulted in a “no” from the Lord for different reasons. AIM called on anyone and everyone they could think of in the short time span and all resulted in a “no” from the Lord for different reasons. I began to wonder what the Lord was doing and what he was pushing us as a leadership team to choose into.
After praying and seriously sitting with the Lord, us as a leadership team had the most peace about sending me to solo lead instead of just finding someone that wasn’t meant to be leading with me… only to fill a void WE wanted to fill… when the Lord actually wanted to fill it in his own way.
The Lord has become my Co-Leader. Where I once was told I would be solo leading, the Lord has actually changed that into giving me the best Co-Leader ever… HIM! He gives me wisdom I don’t understand. He gives me insight I can’t comprehend. He gives me patience I don’t have. He gives me grace I lack. He gives me a balance I don’t have without him. He gives me sound judgment and peace and love and joy and clarity and literally all things to be able to lead this team well.
All the seasons I have gone through has so clearly led me here. Being able to pour out and love on these sweet sweet new friends of mine has been such a blessing from the Lord.
The Lord clearly put me in this position because he has a mighty plan at hand that none of us could have predicted and still can’t foresee.
I have been on the field for a week and I have already had to turn to the Father before I turn to people for advice, help, wisdom, or guidance. This transition has been hard for me as someone who feels love through the constant affirmation from others, but it also will grow me tremendously in my walk with the Lord as I pursue affirmation from him and him alone.
There is a reason everything happened the way it did and there is a reason each and every girl on this POWERFUL and FULL team is here. I am devoted to this team and I am all in. I gave my heart to these girls and this role for these next 3 months all in the Lords great timing and plans. I have a YES in my spirit. I have a passion in my bones. I have a love for these girls they probably won’t ever get to fully understand. I am pursuing to ignite a fire for the Holy Spirit in them here in the Philippines. I am loving getting to watch these girls flourish and to get to flourish right alongside them. I am excited that the Lord has given me the opportunity to jump in head first and dive ALL IN… in the good or bad, hard or easy. I am so expectant to see what the Lord is going to do in us and through us. WOW.
THIS is what bringing kingdom is. Saying YES when the Lord calls us to the little and big things and being obedient to keep saying YES when we don’t understand. It’s hard. It’s painful. It’s so unnerving at times… but when we obey and say yes… the Lord FLOODS with purpose, passion, peace, and perfect love.
I am so thankful the Lord chose me for these girls this season and that he stayed persistent on my heart when I walked astray. What a blessing it will be and it has been already.
SOME DETAILS ABOUT MY TEAM:
- Each participant is aged 18-21
- There are 15 girls (including me)
- It is an all woman’s team
- We are at a super solid and well run ministry in the Philippines (I will write a blog in depth about our ministry and what it consists of and how it is run soon)
- They are all so passionate and all used by the Lord in mighty ways… wether they see it yet or not
PRAYER REQUESTS:
- That the Lord will keep equipping me and pouring into me for this season.
- That fear won’t even be a thought in these girls minds
- That the Holy Spirit will rain down onto us as we start ministry
- NO SICKNESS.
- NO INJURY.
- NO THEFT.
- NO LOOSING OF IMPORTANT THINGS.
- Peace and confidence over these girls hearts
Thank you for reading my blog! Super excited to bring y’all along on another journey with the Lord! A year ago today I was in Malawi Africa on my race and right now I am at a coffee shop in the Philippines writing to you all and I am about to head back home to spend some time with my 14 new sisters. Wow. The Lord has been so faithful and good!
If you feel led to donate, there is a donation link at the top of this blog! I need to raise $2000 in order to continue in this journey! If you are unable to financially support, I would love y’all to be joining me in prayer!
Thank you. I love you. God Bless.
