It’s the beginning of month six.
Time slips through my fingers but moves in slow motion all in one.
Things are everchanging and only one constant exists.
A few days ago I was given a letter.
The letter was from me.
I wrote it before I embarked on this journey.
It brought tears to my eyes.
It was powerful, humbling, refreshing, but also disappointing.
i wasn’t who or where I’d thought I‘d be.
But that’s just it.
THIS IS REAL. RAW. UNPREDICTABLE. UNCHARTED.
It IS a beautful mess.
Its easy for me to see my weaknesses. The flaws. Where I fall short.
Which means it’s time to reflect. To CELEBRATE.
What God has done. The lessons. The LOVE. The FREEDOM. The BEAUTY of it all.
A list of victories:
- i can honestly look in the mirror today and see that I am beautiful and the times I can’t see it I know the lies that don’t reflect Jesus aren’t true anymore, they never were.
- Ive seen God heal knees, shoulders, backs, and headaches and give hope
- I’ve been so filled up with spirit bumps that I can’t help but smile from ear to ear and dance around
- I’ve learned that God speaks in so many beautiful ways (the word, other people, music, journaling, poetry, painting/doodling, verses that pop in my head, animals-especially dogs, books, nature, signs, so far…)
- In India at Awakening I learned and experienced for the first time tangibly that God wants a personal relationship and intimacy with us. We just have to make the time for Him.
- The word is living and precious
- Stop being so dang serious and find joy in every moment
- I have authority in Jesus Christ
- My identity is in God
- I can walk boldly in my identity and am learning to discern lies from the enemy
- I love having dance parties with Jesus
- He has given us all gifts, we just have to accept that we are worthy through Jesus to accept them, and use them for His glory.
- God will continue to teach me that He is uncontainable and will never fit in the boxes I try to put Him in.
- When I screw up, rebel, hide, run away, pout, when I can’t find joy in a moment, when I forget my blessings … HE STILL LOVES ME and will help put me back on the right path and change my perspective.
The truth is that I am beyond blessed to be here, and sometimes I forget that, and that’s okay. My Heavenly Father steers me back in the right direction and my eyes refix on Him.
Im grateful for the letter to myself because it is yet another lesson that my expectations and view of myself is flawed/broken if I’m not seeking to see through His eyes.
This is is a journey of a lifetime. God is so incredibly good. The longer I walk with Him the more I experience His grace, unfailing love, and see His goodness.
He is sooooooo good to us.
Looking back helps propel me forward.
I’m enocuraged and I’m ready.
I’m ready to lean into Him and EMBRACE this gift of where He has brought me.
If you’re reading this and you‘re struggling to see the beauty of where you are and what you’re doing right now, I encourage you to reflect. Also, if you haven’t heard this today, just know that you are so incredibly loved.
Thank you for reading.
Blessings,
Court
