So as I begin this journey, I get a lot of questions and confusion about why the HECK I am doing this. It is, after all a LOT of money to raise, and most people don't understand the appeal of living out of a backpack and essentially being homeless for a year… and lets face it, it is no glamourous vacation. I likely will not shower often. I will probably eat things I can't even identify. I will only be able to communicate with my loved ones via internet, when I can access it. I will sleep in a tent, on the ground, and who knows where else. I will miss major life events- weddings, holidays, etc- I will not have the security of knowing what I will do when I return home. so why? Why would I give it all up? Is it really necessary?
It is not about any of those things. It is not about taking a cool trip. It is not about gaining bragging rights, or being some kind of super Christian.
It is about Him.
It is about the things He has called me too, the things He has burned on my heart that I just can't ignore.
Over a year ago, as I was reading Scriptures, reading the acts of the disciples, and about Jesus' time on earth in the gospels, something was awakened deep inside my heart. This stuff….it is for real. I knew that it was real, of course. I believed the authority of the Bible But suddenly, it took on a whole new level of truth and meaning in my life. I wanted to live in a way that really took Jesus words at face value- not as a metaphor, not as a suggestion, not just as good teaching that warmed my heart. I wanted to experience the Christian life as the Bible talks about it- boldly sharing the word, relying fully on Him, and suffering persecutions and hardships for His names sake. I wanted to actually DO all the things He calls us to in Scripture. To love and forgive people the way Jesus did. Because its either real or its not…right? I am going to take Him seriously, or im not. To me, it seemed there was not much room for in between. And this completely changed not only my perspective, but the way I was living. I also began to learn a lot about justice and God's heart for issues plaguing our world- sex trafficking, homelessness, starvation, persecution….and countless others. He opened my eyes to the needs of my own community in Athens, and what is going on abroad as well, and I began to find ways to be obedient in prayer and doing whatever I could to make a difference.
Fast forward: I spent this past summer leading mission trips on the Eastern Shore of Virginia for high school youth groups for an organization called Youthworks. I have always had a huge passion for youth ministry, and spent the first 3 years of college pouring into an INCREDIBLE group of high schoolers. This passion combined with a love for missions led me to Youthworks, but God had more in store for me there than I ever could have planned. I absolutely fell in love with the community on the Shore. I worked with the children in the Latino immigrant community, residents in a state run group home, and countless other amazing people in the community. I taught (and tried to demonstrate) to the highschoolers lessons about BEING different- acting different, believing different, reacting different, and loving different. Very simple lessons, really. But the more I taught them, the more God taught me about them. He opened up parts of my heart this summer that I didn't even know existed. Everything He had been teaching me and revealing to me the past year before Youthworks suddenly began to make even more sense.
Upon returning home, I began to pray into what God had for me in the next season of my life because I am graduating in May. I have felt a call into ministry for many years now, but I didn't know exactly what that looked like. I have honestly never pictured myself working in a church, but until recently, I also didn't fully understand what full time ministry looked like outside of that. I didnt realize ministry is not about a job title, it is about loving people, building relationships, and bringing God's glory to the earth in whatever it is you do. I began to look into countless opportunities for next year (I like to plan ahead). The World Race was put on my radar, but when I had thought about it in the past, I honestly NEVER thought that would be something I would do. Not because I didn't desire too- but because I never thought God would choose me for something that radical. I didnt trust that He could provide for me in that way. Yet slowly…He put it on my heart, and simultaneously challenged me to work through those fears. I had another opportunity I was seriously considering, but I knew halfway into the application process that it wasn't what God had for me, and soon the door was shut. I was still a bit in denial, however, because honestly, I was afraid. I literally looked into so many things, but I could not get away from the idea of the World Race. The seed that had taken root began to grow, and God showed up in some seriously crazy ways. Through prophetic words from others, direct answers to prayers, and some other amazing signs of confirmation- I just knew that was where I was supposed to go. And as soon as I gave that to God, as soon as I applied, all the fear left. Peace came. Yes, now I had the daunting task of raising support. Of emotionally, spiritually, and mentally preparing myself for the crazy year ahead of me. But all I felt was joy. Peace. Excitement. It is indescribable, this switch that happened. It could only happen by His grace.
One story I want to tell to finish this off- pretty cool :). Last year, 2 random people on seperate occasions- someone who I had only met once or twice, and one of my favorite high school youth, prayed over me and received words from the Lord about me knowing exactly where I was going when I graduated, and the peace I would have about it. My youth, Marisa, also said that she had seen a compass in her vision. I never knew exactly what those two words meant for me- but for some reason they were burdened on my heart. I journaled about them and saved them, and have treasured them, even though they honestly didn't make much sense and I didn't know what they meant for me. I have asked the Lord about them often…and just waited. Because even when I got home from Youthworks in August, I felt like more things had opened up to me rather than things being narrowed down.
However, once I officially became a part of the World Race team a couple of weeks ago, these 2 words suddenly completely made sense! So cool 🙂 But what was even crazier…this morning, as I was up making my bed and getting ready for school, I had a huge AHA! moment. The compass…in the picture Marisa had given me…. was the emblem of adventures in missions. ALL over AIM's website, ALL over the worldrace website…is that compass she had seen, that I had drawn in my journal a YEAR ago. WHAT?! How had I never noticed that before (especially considering the ridiculous amount of time I spend on the worldrace website)?! I started crying and dancing around my room like a crazy person, praising God….because once again, I heard Him telling me that He has amazing things for me, GOOD and PERFECT plans for me, and that He has known them all along. He has better things for me than I could EVER dream up for myself. WOW. What an incredible heavenly father I have!
