Debrief.
A time of the R's- rest, relaxation, & rejuvenation.
…and then God decided to wreck my life.
I woke up one morning, and as I laid in my bed and stared at the ceiling- I felt that still, small voice echo in my soul:
"Something new is coming."
A brokenness washed over my entire body, my entire spirit. And as the day continued, I waited. In expectation.
…in desperation.
I asked the W's- what? why? when?
And He remained silent.
Then I heard that voice again-
"Courtney- you are so absolutely convinced that I move at the sound of your voice, and I love that about you. You know that your prayers are powerful and effective. You know that I love you and I hear you and that you are a child of mine…
But i'm not convinced that you always move at the sound of my voice."
I have spent so much of my life being ashamed of my story. I have wasted so much time holding in the things He has given me, the things He is teaching me, the things He is saying to me, out of…fear. Out of shame. Out of a twisted belief that nothing I say really matters. I have been content to sit in silence.
Because He has freely given to me. And He has waited patiently for my response. To walk into a season of being unafraid to release everything He is doing inside- to my team, my squad, and to every person and place I encounter.
My heart is full. My spiriit is restless and digging in for more. Ministry this month here at Nueva Vida Outreach Center has been beautiful and full of newness and amazing people… expect a blog on everything going on soon!
"Freely you have received, so freely give."
That night, as I lined up with the other leaders to pray over each of our squadmates, something happened.
I released the tidal wave that has been building up inside of me.
...I found my voice again.
From debrief, we arrived to our current location, Jinotepe, Nicaragua. And He hasn't stopped. Every night since that last night at debrief, He has been speaking to me ever so clearly.
In dreams.
In visions.
Because He has freely given to me. And He has waited patiently for my response. To walk into a season of being unafraid to release everything He is doing inside- to my team, my squad, and to every person and place I encounter.
Slowly, but surely, I am learning how to "freely give." And the more I release, the more He entrusts me with.
My heart is full. My spiriit is restless and digging in for more. Ministry this month here at Nueva Vida Outreach Center has been beautiful and full of newness and amazing people… expect a blog on everything going on soon!
Love & Blessings, my sweet friends!
