Welcome world to my life insight for the past month.
Let's just say that July has been an absolute thrilling and exhausting experience for me. If you haven’t noticed, keeping any sort of update online this month has been downright near impossible. It’s seemed sporadic and completely insane…if you know where it went, you should let me know. So here’s the rerun—its long…(my apologizes)
"when my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the rock that is higher than I…." Psalm 61:2
Journeyquest:
Beginning of the month
Energy level: high
At the beginning of this month, I was made a Trip Leader for whitewater rafting. Basically it’s a whole new host of responsibilities, and the freedom to take trips down the river by myself. It takes so many hundreds of river miles and a continued display of confidence to become a TL. Maybe it was because my boss saw me handle a snake slithering over my foot with no screaming involved. (I had no idea it was there)….or my crazy mad air guitar/yoga skills while guiding through a rapid. Regardless, its been an awesome honor. The beginning of July was filled with raft trips morning and afternoon. Along with that, the staff at Journeyquest have continued to grow in community. I cannot tell you how much I love the people I work with. Despite their lack of hygiene, odd smells, quirky sayings, and ‘river ratness,’ I’ve fallen in love with them. Community is such a special gift……can’t really think about saying goodbye to them in a week.
Journeyquest: Backpacking
Middle of the month
Energy level: depleting
I’ve been a backpacking guide for three years now, but always with other guides on the trip. In the middle of this month, though, I led my first solo guide 5 day backpacking trip with a wonderful family for Texas. The Sangre De Cristo Mountain Range is the most difficult in Colorado to climb. The vert and ascent basically makes life miserable for anyone hiking. So, on that happy note, it’s not any understatement to say it was one of the most challenging backpacking trips I’ve taken. To top it all, my body decided to start rebelling as the whole of summer’s physical toll began to set in. Yet, the family I took up (who were troopers) and the scenery I found myself immersed in, made the air between God and I seem so thin. He was close on the mountains, and gave me exactly what I needed for the day. The Saturday after the trip was done, though, my body felt like it had been hit by a giant semi…multiple times. Yea, I was extremely tired.
Young Life Camp: Lost Canyon
End of July
Energy Level: Empty
The Saturday my backpacking trip ended, I didn’t get a break, but drove immediately down the Grand Junction to stay the night and leave bright and early that Sunday for Arizona and a week with 400 high school peeps going crazy wild at camp. I literally felt like a complete blob with nothing to offer the kids or anyone I was around. Heck, I hadn’t even showered or unpacked my backpack. The month of July had been anything but relaxing, and I felt that breaking point creeping in. I wanted to give up, sit down on a couch, eat ice cream, watch movies, or do anything alone. I felt weak and completely out of control.
I honestly had no idea how I was going to make it through the week.
But then it hit me….
Sometimes the most courageous and fulfilling act you can do is to simply surrender. To give up. To stand and raise your hands as high as you can…and tell God you’re done. Sometimes giving it to God, letting the tears stream down if you need, and opening your hands can be completely enough and brave in and of itself.
So I did. I gave the week to God. I gave my physically, emotionally, and spiritually drained body to Him. —-And I cannot tell you how incredible camp was. Chains were broken. I had energy, I had strength, I had joy…all because of Him. So may of my high school friends accepted Christ this past week. They saw something life giving!!! Heaven was basically having the most legit dance party ever I’m pretty sure.
So the month of July? ….Yea, I had to give up. Admit I didn’t have the energy. Acknowledged I felt out of control. Rarely are God sized adventures easy…..but, hey’re worth it though.
Journeyquest ends in a week. And while my body is slowly recovering, I’m trying to savor every last second I have with the staff. In 7 days, I’ll be in my own bed, by family, and in world race mode. I’ve got 5 months before I leave the country, a lot of moola to raise, training camp, student teaching…and the list goes on. But for now, I'm leaning on the rock that is higher than I.
