Bloopers Blog
So if you don’t know me yet, allow me to (re)introduce myself. My name is Corbyn and a majority of my life could be a comedy movie/TV show. After everything that has happened to me and everything I’ve had the privilege to be apart of and experience, I thought the bloopers of this journey so far would be the best thing to share. (So many more to come FYI) Side note Papa God has blown my mind in such a short time but that can’t be put into words yet, but it’ll come soon no worries.
Gray Hound Chronicles
?First off, Gray Hound buses are just woah….. I don’t know, just go take a 18 hour bus ride on one and get back to me. Anyway, on one of our many layovers on the way to D.C. at 3 in the morning, we saw this older man passed out on a bench in the Gray Hound bus station with tea bags shoved up his nose. Delirious, we all cried laughing but no of us were actually surprised. Like I said go take a ride on the Gray Hound and come back to me.
Kristen and the Cat Throw Up
The whole squad was just sitting around eating lunch, talking and what not after ministry that morning. We all noticed the cat had thrown up pretty close to us or at least I thought we all noticed it. The throw up was dark brown, chunky and super gross, needless to say, noticeable. All of a sudden, I look over and somehow Kristen is laying in the cat throw up and we all started hysterically laughing. She got up and ran inside.
Moriah and the Trash Bag
?So our ministry host asked us to gather the trash from all the trash cans and take it out. Easy enough, right? Moriah grabs a trash bag and walks outside to the trash can. She puts the trash bag over the top of the trash can and holds the trash can with one hand and the trash bag with the other. Then she flips the trash can over and all the trash spills out all over the ground and her feet…. Her face was priceless when she turned and looked me. I couldn’t help but bust out laughing.
It’s Already to Late
?Toilet paper is hard to come by, and before you realize it, you’re in a real situation. (Fun Fact: 90% of missionary’s poop there pants on the field. Also solid poop is a big deal on the field too but that’s beside the point.) Our girl Moriah realizes she has to poop, so she runs up stairs to a private bathroom where she pants to have a peaceful experience and finally poop. Everything is going great, she poops but when she reaches for the toilet paper, she discovers there is none to be found. Slightly panicking, she realizes her only opposition is to pull up her pants up and go down stairs to find toilet paper. She pulls her pants up slowly and starts to make her way down stairs. Thank the Lord there is toilet paper in the other bathroom and she actually can whip this time but sadly, it’s to late and she has poop in her pants. Lets just say it was a squashy bus ride home from ministry that day.
You Gotta Do What You Gotta Do
?My team and I had just finished team time and I needed to poop, which is awesome because it’s not a common thing on the field if were being real here. I went to the bathroom, pooped and it was great but when I turned around to grab the toilet paper, there wasn’t any. I had two options, yell and hope someone heard me with the whole squad knowing what just occurred. (Side note: there would have been no toilet paper for them to get me because we didn’t have any at the time.) Yeah, I wasn’t really feeling that option, so I turned to my left and saw a shower. So I did the only other thing I could and got in the shower and rinsed off. Okay yeah, I walked out of the bathroom with the end of shirt and my legs dripping water but at least I didn’t walk out with something else. (Insert “Hard Times” by Paramore)
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So many great times, great memoires, and it’s just the beginning. So thankful to just be here. Papa is on the move. Don’t miss it!
