“I don’t know if I can do this.” Have you ever found yourself saying or thinking those words? I have. In fact, I found myself thinking it just the other day.
It’s so easy to get excited about the World Race. I mean come on, 11 countries in 11 months, who wouldn’t get excited? You get to see and experience so many different places, meet tons of new people, learn from incredible cultures, eat crazy food, make life-long friends, create unbelievable memories, and share the transforming love of Jesus with many individuals along the way! Yes, the World Race has incredible selling points… but it’s not all raindrops on roses or whiskers on kittens. In January I applied to the world race and until recently I haven’t experienced any hesitation, doubt, fear, anxiety, or second thoughts about my decision.
So what happened?
Well, to be honest, the reality of the race has begun to set in. I think some people assume the race is an elaborate vacation, but that just isn’t true. Over the next year I’ll live out of two backpacks, sleep on hard floors, sit through multiple 30+ hour bus rides, expose myself to people who have serious diseases, shower with cold, stagnate water from a bucket, eat weird foods that will no doubt land me in a “bathroom” where a flush toilet is nonexistent, sweat all day every day, kill giant bugs, scratch the spots they bite me, and miss my family more than I ever have before. I could go on, but hopefully you’re re-thinking the whole “vacation” thing by now lol.
The funny thing is, back in January I was stoked about all that stuff. I couldn’t wait to live simply and embrace everything about being a world racer. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am still excited, but now a trace of anxiety couples my excitement. Truth is, the World Race is not easy. It isn’t a comfortable, posh vacation around the globe. Rather, it’s a monster missions undertaking with huge implications… some of which are just beginning to set in.
So how am I currently feeling? Well… I’m nervous.
And that’s ok.
There’s a misconception which says following God equals the absence of fear, doubt, anxiety, hesitation, etc. As if all of a sudden we become some sort of superhuman or superhero impervious to “weak” human emotions. This is false. You ARE human. There is good news however… it’s ok to be human and feel human emotions. God understands that we are going to feel afraid, nervous, anxious, hesitant, and terrified. In fact, He designed us with those emotions! Unfortunately, we tend to put on a mask so others don’t see us as weak or inferior. Can I remind you of something? Everyone experiences fear, anxiety, doubt, etc. You are not alone.
The bigger problem occurs when we try to hide these feelings from God. We often convince ourselves that we possess the strength to carry our fear all our own. This is nothing more than a feeble attempt at being our own Savior… #impossible. We were never meant to carry all the stress and weight that comes with being a human being. That leads me to the truth I want to encourage you with today. It’s the same truth God has been strengthening my soul with this past week.
You Are Loved!
All of you. Yes, even the human part of you. You are so cherished, accepted, and adored by the Almighty that you never need feel ashamed of the emotions He created you with. Don’t let this aspect of the human experience steal your intimacy with God; rather, let it enhance your intimacy with God. Wouldn’t it be amazing if worry became a conversation starter with our heavenly Father? What if we allowed our consistent anxiety lead us into consistent prayer? Can you imagine how our faith would grow if fear taught us to lean heavily upon God’s strength? Think of the spiritual result if our doubts were there to remind us of His unwavering truth! See, I believe God wired us with these emotions to propel us toward a deeper more intimate relationship with Him. Don’t be ashamed of them. Instead… how does Paul put it again?… Rejoice in your weakness, because in our weakness, He is strong. (2 Corinthians 12:10)
Give God your, “I don’t know if I can do this.” Then rest with anticipation as He whispers back, “It’s ok my child, I can.”
“Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:24
