“Mommom is declining more rapidly than we thought, so Connor, it might be best if you could go.”
These were the words that shook me this past Monday as I read an email from my mom. I had just learned the day before that the doctors recently discovered cancer throughout my grandmother’s body and that she had an estimated 3 months to live. One day later, I was making plans to drive 8 hours to Philadelphia to possibly say goodbye to my grandma one last time. Talk about a bad start to the week.
To be honest, this news shook me. I hadn’t been expecting it, nor was I prepared to lose another grandparent. Thankfully, God took a very sorrowful situation and wrapped it in grace.
I arrived in Mommom’s room at 11 pm this past Wednesday and was overjoyed to see her wake up for a few seconds, squeeze my hand, and tell me that she loves me. I held that frail hand for quite a long time as she slept and wrestled to stay alive. Though only a few days have passed as I sit and write this, but that night has become one of the sweetest memories of my life.
Mommom passed away the next day on Thursday, April 19, 2018. Though my heart is heavy, it is also extremely full. Mommom was completely surrounded by love as she left this earth and she is wrapped in the arms of Jesus, the embodiment of love, as we speak!
This experience was life-changing and has given me some much-needed clarity.
- First, I have been reminded that I am so blessed to be a part of a truly incredible family. My grandma has 5 daughters (my mom being the oldest) and it was truly moving to witness the love they demonstrated not only towards Mommom, but to each other as well as the rest of our family. I was so encouraged to see uncles, cousins, etc. drop everything to be with Mommom and say goodbye. I think this speaks to the legacy of my grandmother as well as the love and support that exists within our family.
- Second, this experience reminded me that so much of what I prioritize in my life really doesn’t matter. When someone you love is in trouble or is approaching the end of their life it is amazing what that does to your perspective. Mommom’s life has influenced me greatly, but her passing has also had a monumental impact upon my life and I couldn’t be more thankful.
- Finally, I realized that I want to dedicate my World Race journey to Mommom. Mommom and I would always talk about Jesus and she never failed to encourage my passion and vision for worldwide missions work. In fact, she often told me that she wished she could have done more missions work herself. This is an incredible statement because Mommom’s life was dedicated to caring for the lives of others, and it is an honor as her grandson to carry her legacy around the world.
One of the last things I said to my grandmother before she passed was that I love her and that I am going to do the World Race for her.
So Mommom, this is for you.
– Love Connor
