Oy vey! (Got to have that Miley Cyrus throwback!)
What did I get myself into?! Why would I forgo the comforts of a nice bed, a warm shower, and the familiarity of my own culture? Why would I get up and leave after I just got back from a six month Discipleship Training School (DTS)?
All because I heard that still small voice say, “Go!”
I just got back from training camp for this crazy World Race journey, living in a tent or hammock, eating foods that are from different cultures, working out with the squad at ungodly hours (not a morning person :P), and spending 10 days in a community that is God centered with a fear of the Lord and a desire to grow.
After spending 6 months abroad with YWAM (Youth With A Mission) and learning about God’s character and nature, hearing God’s voice, Fear of the Lord, and Making Jesus Lord, I was desperate for some rest and recuperation. I needed to process, and coming into Training Camp, I was flustered and had some serious culture shock. But, around the third day, God restored my longing; He gave me new perspectives and a glimpse of things to come. Yes, there was a lot that YWAM taught me that training camp just restated/re-worded for me and things that I had already done, but I was reminded to let God out of the box that He doesn’t fit in and trust.
Trust is one thing that God has been speaking over and over to me. Do you trust me? I never really answered Him; He has asked me twice already. I just let it go over my head or find something to distract me from what God is asking.
Once I let the question hit me and wonder if I do trust Him, He began to shine a light on areas where I have been hurt and where I have felt some serious shame. God shines a light on things so we see them, we don’t have to let go until we are ready ourselves, but just so we know they are there and see them.
I was reminded of something that happened a year ago that brought some intense shame to my life. It happened right before I left for YWAM in Australia. I never told anyone until training camp, and when I did; God broke the chains. God has this uncanny knack of healing things that I never realized I needed healing from.
OH! So, there was a man hike during training camp. We hiked twelve miles of the AT (Appalachian Trail) which was so much fun, but oh so tiring. I loved being able to talk and experience the trail and God’s creation with the ten guys on my squad. While I was hiking, God revealed that the mountains that I faced, the struggles and the shame that I have had in my life (which you will hear about in future blogs). I have allowed myself to ‘encamp’ at the base of those mountains. God telling me to ‘MOVE!’ but, me, just being stubborn and almost liking the comfort, refused.
As I climbed the physical mountain, I was climbing the spiritual mountain I was encamped at for so long. When we reached the top, I looked out at the view and God told me that He has this beautiful life laid out for me, that I’ve already said yes, now I just need to trust in Him and allow Him to be LORD and King of my life, to lay down my own rights and allow Him to lead me (submitting is something God has been teaching me).
I climbed my mountain and I am in awe of the grandeur of who God is. Not every moment is easy… actually a lot is hard and it’s tough and it’s messy to follow Him sometimes, but seeing that view, tasting and seeing what the LORD has for me, is something that I want more of. It is a desire to be closer, a desire for a deeper relationship with Jesus.
Everyone on my squad is beautiful and has amazing testimonies of the power of redemption and healing of what Christ has done. I am excited to see what God teaches me through each and every one of them. I am excited for this next year, this next season.
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I am still $3,850 away from meeting my goal/deadline of $10,000 dollars!! I am so thankful for all the support by prayers or money. Would you consider donating even $5? There is no such thing as too little. You are valuable and needed for bringing the gospel to people who need hope.
