8.8.18.
I just said my first goodbye. I won’t see him for 15 months. I won’t see him till NEXT Christmas. On a regular basis, i may only see my dear cousin Toby, once or twice a year, but gosh I’m filled with sadness thinking that I will go 15 months without his loud laughter and friendly smile. I’ll miss walking around Cookeville with him and everyone recognizing him. I’ll miss his strong comforting hugs. I’ll miss his powerful singing voice. I’ll miss the impromptu instrument lessons. I’ll miss seeing him shine bright on the stage. I’ll miss brushing through his dark hair while watching movies. I’ll miss bonding over musicals, and playing revolution with our whole family.
It’s so hard saying goodbye to people, but not for the reason you may think. For me, I feel like I do not realize that I won’t see these people for so long until AFTER I’m gone. It’s hard for me to process that I’m actually leaving for nine months.
It’s not just a few months till I’m back for Thanksgiving or Christmas. No. While I’m gone I’m going to miss holidays with sweet family. I won’t be able to make memories with my extended family. I will miss the reunions with my friends when they get back from college.
But it’s all because God has something different in store for my next nine months.
In the grand scheme of life, a year is much longer than a month, but it’s not close to 10 or 20 years by any means. And then putting it into even more perspective, one year is nothing in comparison to eternity in Heaven. It is these very relationships that I have to be willing to let go of for a little bit. It won’t be fun, it will include less faccetimes than I want, it will be hard, it will be a struggle to be separated from the people I love most for the longest time in the history of my life. But ministry is sacrifice. This seems to be a common theme for me recently, and I think it may just become my life anthem. We were saved to serve, so I must do just that and follow God wholeheartedly.
